Under Pressure
by myTme
Summary: With strange nighttime noises, Faye working a second job and Ed's new game of hassle the cowboy; Jet needs a vacation. Will things work out or will Jet and Ed come back to two dead partners and a starving dog? Rated for language and implications.
1. Ch 1: Battery

Under Pressure (Queen)

Sadly, I do not own the characters of _Cowboy Bebop_. They are the property of Sunrise, Bones, and Bandai Visual (2001). They make the money, not me. Nor can I take credit my chapter headings- they are the product of their authors.

Chapter 1: Battery (Metallica)

Jet scowled and shook the ineffective gadget. Grumbling about inconveniences he flipped the remote over and popped it open.

"What the hell?"

Empty. Gutted. Just like his comm, all the available flashlights and his spare radio. He glared at the hole where four, shiny, silver batteries should have been. He'd just bought new for Pete's sake! A cold panic flooded his system. Jumping to his feet he scrambled to the kitchen, opened the fridge and dug out his dummy box of baking powder- it had been his hiding place for batteries, smokes, sweet treats and so much more since Spike moved in. It had become one of his little boxes of comfort on a ship full of neurotic chaos. A secret collection of must haves but do not wish to shares. The scowl morphed to paranoid twitching. The weight was wrong. He tipped the box out- someone on the ship had found his stash of unshareables. The problem, who?

Ein clicked in. Cocked his head. Jet studied the pooch apprehensively. The dog was eerily intelligent, but lacked the proper appendages and height to open the refrigerator, remove the box and pop off the stubbornly secure lid. Blue eyes narrowed, thumbs were necessary for such a sneaky deed. Which left: everyone else.

Ein's ears quirked at the sound of flapping feet. The soft split-splat filled the tense atmosphere with a bit of comedic relief. Ed loped into the room. Jet considered her as she carefully twirled around the quadruped, offered a lopsided grin, snagged one of the bon-bons from his stash and disappeared. _Hmmm…_ his lips pressed tightly as he thought, gaze returning to the bright orange box, _Ed has never shown an interest in baking soda and the candy hadn't been taken…_

On autopilot he stuffed the box guts back in place and returned it home under the tiny, little light bulb at the back of the icebox; closed the door and left the kitchen. His lip curled into a snarl, _And then there were two._ Dusting off his hands he steered towards the part of the ship his

suspects lived, he would catch the thief. Nobody defiled one his sanctuaries without repercussions and if he had his way, the battery nabber was destined for a reckoning he or she would have difficulty **ever **forgetting.

--------------------

Faye snickered and put another battery into her newest 'trial item'. Jet really needed a new place to store his treasures. She'd known about the soda box, the bag of peas, the third bonsai on the left, his hidden drawer in the toolbox and the air vent in the bathroom long before she became a permanent fixture aboard the ship. She giggled as she slipped the last one home, certain Jet was having a shit hemorrhage over the loss of portable electricity, and Spike would have a stroke if he ever found out how the ship had been kept well supplied with very few bounties. She schooled her features and slipped the offensive item under her pillow, the report of an enraged stomp stormed towards her door. She flopped on her back, pretending to read- just in case. The door hissed open, a seething man backlit by the hall light.

Faye blinked, surprised to see Jet glaring at her.

"Where are they, Faye?"

Swallow, "What?"

Eyes slit, "You know."

Blink, "Know what?"

There was a crack, "Why didn't you ask?"

"Ask for what?!" she glared at her disintegrating doorframe, "Knock it off Jet you're goin' to bust my door."

Another disturbing snap, "And that's a problem, why? It's my ship."

She sat up, incensed, "**Because **I need privacy!"

"Bullshit," Spike drifted by with a grumbled snort, "You're a prime exhibitionist." He paused, returning to leer at the gaping cowgirl, "I should know I went with you to **that** bar the other night."

Jet twitched at the sudden shift in the atmosphere, Faye had gone from livid to humble in record time. He turned to his sneering partner, "What happened?"

Grin. Shrug. "Faye decided to be the night's entertainment." He winked, "Didn't you get some tips for that little stunt?"

She blinked, hoping he'd be kind enough to spare her the humiliation that would incur if Jet, and therefore Ed, learned how she had managed to snag the group's largest sum of the year. She cringed; she'd never hear the end of it! Ed was already asking a variety of questions about various activities and she'd seen Jet's stash of magazines, had even bought a few, hidden under the third bonsai on the left. She didn't want to add to his fantasy fodder. Nope, he was not the cowboy aboard the Bebop she hoped was thinking about her in such a potentially, mutually gratifying way. She shivered unconsciously it just felt wrong to **even **consider the eldest cowboy thinking of her **that **way.

Jet studied her futile attempt to blend into the wall, batteries forgotten. More interested in what she'd pulled to make her blush so quickly. He paused; perhaps it would be best not to know. Faye had a tendency to go overboard. Frown, but she'd never done anything too sordid or debauched, at least by Bebop standards. The woman was a card sharp and swindler but she had her limits. He glanced at his partner again. The smirk on Spike's face promised that whatever she had pulled, it would be worth it to have Ed dig up the security footage from the bar.

Faye's expression morphed from fear to forced composure then smug, "What? Two girls kissin' too much for you to handle," she purred, "Cowboy?"

Jet tapped his head, certain he'd heard wrong.

"Please." Snort. "Only reason you followed through was because you knew the bounty had a thing for that shit."

Her eyebrow quirked, "I don't recall you steppin' in and cuffing anyone while I kept the crowd busy." She snickered, "Glad your jaw finally realigned," stepped closer, "you get the dirt off your chin?"

Jet gaped- he hadn't misheard.

Spike shifted.

Faye cooed, "Too busy enjoying the show to help out; weren't ya, Spiky?"

Twitch.

She swayed to her bed. Jet cleared his throat, highly uncomfortable with his position between the pair. It was about as safe as no man's land on Titan. She settled on the edge of her bed, lips parted in a devilish smile, "You and the bounty have similar tastes, hmmm?"

Jet jerked, positive he needed to dig up the security video of the take-down.

Spike shrugged, "Nah. To be honest I was mortified." His head waggled in mock disgust, "It's not every day you get to see **two** desperate women act out in order to receive a modicum of male attention." Grin, "Did your daddy not give you enough love, Faye?"

"You…" she pinked, "You…" She stood. Jet elbowed the gloating cowboy back and tugged the door closed; Faye slamming against the metal barrier as it clicked, "BASTARD!!" She continued ranting furious, scathing retorts. Each varied insult linked to Spike's character, physical attributes and/or abilities clearly making their way through the thick walls. Jet cringed. She was livid which meant, most likely, they would all suffer. Silently contemplating a sightseeing vacation with Ed he watched Spike limp away. His arms had floated up, his hands linked behind his head, the physical embodiment of sincere smug. His whistling and uneven footfalls echoing back.

Jet focused on the suddenly silent room, a sense of dread parking in his gut. He rubbed his beard. Then remembered why he'd been at Faye's door in the first place. With a tentative peek back at the simmering cowgirl's room he decided to throw valor out the hatch and grumped off to 'trim his bonsai' and pretend he hadn't noticed the batteries were missing. It wasn't like he didn't know where the other stashes were- it just irked him that his favorite and most convenient hidey hole had been desecrated. _She could've at least asked!_

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Spike flopped over. No good, the sound still carried through. Deciding Ed must have found a new toy he needed to step on, brown eyes cracked open to scan the dimly lit room. He scowled at the solitude. No Ed with a new remote controlled something or other. He scanned up the wall. No large insect droning lazily across the ceiling. Nothing. His forehead furrowed in thought, was Jet vacuuming? The ex-cop had been rather displeased over something Faye had done, why else would he have been at her door in prime lecture position? Shrug. Perhaps he was burning off some steam? The soft buzz continued. _It sounds like the ship's hard drives. _Deciding to utilize his talents in disregarding nuisances he rolled towards the wall, burrowed under his bedding and forced sleep to return.

……….

Twitch. The noise was subtle, hardly noticeable if it weren't so quiet, but invasive.

……….

It was persistent but he refused to accept defeat and buried his head under the pillow.

……….

He shifted, there was definitely someone humming just over the soft thrum.

……….

Vocalizations grew chaotic.

The quilt was yanked higher, only a nose poking through.

……….

Soft moaning.

His eyelids mashed tighter. He would prevail, God dammit!

……….

THUMP! Someone bumped the wall.

Smirk. He now knew where the annoyance was coming from and by the slight creaking underlying the constant thrum he would be able to 'deal' with the problem efficiently, noisily and enjoy every moment of it. Pleased, he now had a target to vent his frustrations upon he relaxed and drifted off into light, happy fantasies full of retaliation and highly gratifying retribution. A slight, nagging thought continued weaseling its way to the fore, he was certain he'd heard a name which could pose problematic. There shouldn't be any reason for her to mention a name, especially **his **name while she was cleaning her room or beautifying. Grin, _She probably tripped and cussed._ Satisfied, he forced the miniscule amount of worry from his thoughts and drifted off to sleep.


	2. Ch 2: Howza Bouta Kiss Babe

Sadly, I do not own the characters of _Cowboy Bebop_. They are the property of Sunrise, Bones, and Bandai Visual (2001). They make the money, not me. Nor can I take credit my chapter headings- they are the product of their authors.

Chapter 2: Howza Bouta Kiss Babe (Toy Dolls)

Jet stared listlessly at Spike through the steam of his morning coffee, feeling slightly vindicated. By Spike's haggard expression, the lanky cowboy had fared the night equally well.

"Mornin'."

Glare, "What was Faye doin' last night?"

"Huh?"

"It sounded kind of like she was buffing something, she get an automatic nail file or..." frown, "An electric razor?" Scowl, "One of those file things that scrapes rough skin off?" He glared at the floor, "A tiny vacuum for dust bunnies?"

"What?" The only nail file Jet had seen the woman use was made of emery. Spike should know she didn't have an electric razor because the day before he'd spent a good chunk of the afternoon grumbling about her using **his** razor to shave her legs. From what he could recall Faye preferred pumice stones to remove calluses and for dust bunnies, Faye just swept all the crap on her floor out into the hallway, she didn't believe in vacuuming. He scowled, he knew **way** too much about her preferences for their relationship to be normal.

Snarl, "All fucking night." He twitched, "What the hell's her problem? She scaly with nails made of steel?! I mean, it's got to take a lot to keep all the dragon attributes hidden, but Judas Fucking Priest!" He slopped coffee as he dropped the mug on the counter, "She kept talking too!"

Jet's eyebrow quirked, Spike had to be playing stupid. There was **no** way the cowboy was this naïve.

"Quit smirking." Another irritated spasm. "She pulls that again tonight and it'll be the last."

Grin. He was a big boy and he'd been hurt worse than Faye could inflict. Especially if she was indisposed doing 'research' for her second job. It had been an interesting choice of employment. Actually, it had shocked the hell out of him when she came back from a rather bizarre take-down at a sex shop with crutches and a new job as a sales clerk. He had to give her credit. She'd done remarkably well keeping the stable income from Spike, considering she went several times a week. Those few days she put in at the store had given them enough money to keep Spike medicated, Ed and Ein fed, and Faye off the ship and busy -she had a tendency to worry and fuss with nothing to do; which saved him a bundle in aspirin purchases. He'd nearly had a self induced aneurism just to get some peace and quiet before her employment at Hedone Mercantile.

"Spike, I'd let it go." Shrug, "She was probably workin'." The missing batteries suddenly made sense. If Spike had taken them the smokes would've disappeared too. He sighed. There must have been a new shipment- suddenly glad he and Ed slept on the other side of the ship from the pair Jet decided the day was looking up.

"Workin' on what?"

Jet shrugged.

"Stop grinning." Spike snarled, "There is **nothing** to be chipper about."

"Good morning."

Jet gave Faye a nod.

She yawned, "Sleep well?"

"Better 'n Spike apparently." Blue eyes twinkled.

Her bottom lip slipped out in mock pity, "Ahh… bad dreams?"

"What the hell were you doing last night?"

Frown, "Excuse me?"

Jet snickered at the rising blush spreading across her chest and racing for her hairline.

"What was that noise?"

Blink. "What noise?"

Growl, "What were you doing last night?"

Shrug accompanied with a nervous titter, "Sleeping?"

"Bull."

The blush darkened, "I… I…I do-n't know what you're talking about."

Jet choked on his coffee, earning a mortified glare from the cowgirl.

"GOOD morning Bebop crew!" Ahh. Faye visibly relaxed, saved by the Ed. The teen twirled around the fuming cowboy, "Why does Spike-person look like he drank one of Ed's special juices?"

"I didn't."

She froze and gasped, "That was an experiment! Spike-person!" she scowled, "Ed had labeled it just like Papa Jet said to." She spun on the older cowboy and whined, "Why did Papa Jet let Lunkhead Spike drink Ed's creation and not take notes?!"

It was Spike's turn to blink, "Eh… why would Jet need to take notes?"

Golden eyes squinted, "Why is Spike-person worried if he did not drink Ed's juice?"

Damn, that kid had spent too much time listening to him and Faye argue. Shrug, "Didn't. Just curious."

She studied the cowboy closely, "Ed will know if you've taken a sip." Her head tilted sideways, "There will be…" grin, "Side effects." Giggle, "Nasty side effects." Nod. "Ein doggy threw up on Papa Jet's paper when Ed gave him some juice."

Said dog padded into the room and flopped painfully across the floor.

"Ed." Jet glared at the drooling dog. "What was in the juice?"

She blinked at him as though trying to decide if he were kidding or brain damaged. Unsure she clicked her tongue before replying with a shrug, "Barf syrup."

Faye snorted, "Where the hell'd you get ipecac from?"

Jet groaned, "I had some on hand. Remember when Ed and Ein got into that eat everything off the floor fix and chewed up a few of Spike's pain pills?"

Nod.

"Right." He frowned at Faye's lack of concern, "Well it worried me so I bought some, you know, just in case."

Spike grinned, "Jet. Ed only ate one, if that."

Blink, "But… but the whole…"

"I was mobile," grin, "I hurt, so I self medicated. Faye knew, wonder why she didn't…"Ed giggled, her experimental juice on hand, "Faye-Faye said Ed had the flu when Papa Jet thought Ed had eaten Spike's forbidden tic-tacs."

Spike scanned the room, "Where is Faye?"

Ed tipped onto her toes, "At work."

"Huh?" Spike's glare swiveled to Jet's back, "Why's Faye out on a bounty without me?"

Ed grinned, "Faye-Faye's not…"

Jet froze, "Drop it Ed." He turned to the frowning hacker, "Go flush that." He shook his head, wondering how much the teen knew- one could never be too careful with her.

"But…"

Jet's voice took on a threatening tone, "Now." He glanced at Spike still waiting for an answer. "It's not a bounty."

Eyebrow quirk, "What is it then?"

"Faye-Faye sells…" Ed's giggle floated back, "things." Jet rubbed his face, apparently Ed had done some research. "She's a merchandise expert at a little… uh…" the flapping feet stilled, "…uh…" Both men shared a glance; they could hear the gears turning. "Oh yeah, at a little novelty shop on Tethys." The split-splat resumed just before a hatch opened and closed.

Ein whined.

"Huh?"

Grin, "Faye's been workin' at a nearby shop since we've been in orbit. It pulls in enough to keep food on the table."

"But she helped me pull in a bounty two nights ago."

"Yup. She's a busy girl."

Spike's eyes narrowed, "Why do I get the feeling you're editing?"

Jet's shoulders jerked just before he slipped out the door, leaving the cranky cowboy to mull over the latest discovery. Being doped up and bed ridden for six months really knocks a guy out of the loop- but it explained the logoed polo shirt and short skirt.

Ein produced a disturbing gagging noise, coughed and yakked.

"Ergh." He glared at the dog, "Clean it up."

Ein's head rolled sideways.

Spike crossed his arms, "I have to clean up after myself when I hurl."

The dog produced a pathetic whimper and waddled off.

Deciding to leave the puppy present for Jet; or better yet, Faye; Spike stepped over the puddle and sulked off to find what had produced the disturbance from the night before.

He grinned when her door opened without resistance. Deciding there was nothin' like complacency he snickered. The space was surprisingly clean, he glanced at the small bureau covered in various bottles of feminine beautification and scowled. There was nothing electrical. No pedicure kit, or razor, heck he would have been satisfied with one of those sonic toothbrushes. What was it then? He rifled through her drawers, pleased to have an opportunity to add a little chaos to Faye's retreat. He tried to ignore the images and lascivious grin that kept creeping across his face whenever he found one of her more effeminate articles of underclothing. Disturbed with the current road his thoughts had decided to veer, he slapped the dresser closed and studied the room. His eyes slit, _Hmmm… If I was Faye where would I hide an obnoxiously noisy something or other?_ Brown eyes took in the slightly rumpled comforter. Curious he wandered towards the bed, wrenching the side table's drawer out. Nothing. The only things of interest a book on the research of some man named Alfred Kinsey, a substantial stash of batteries, pack of **his** smokes and the silver lighter that had disappeared long before his 'accident'. With a snarl he retrieved the miss placed articles and snapped the drawer back home. Pulling out a smoke he opened the drawer and studied the short, brightly colored cylinders. _What does Faye need with so many batteries?_

He exhaled. Growing bored with hide-and-seek, he checked under her mattress and pillows, rummaged through her closet, and out of principal, rearranged her carefully ordered bottles of perfumes, lotions and powders; before skulking off to grump about his paltry detective skills.

Jet's grunt drifted around the crack in the bonsai room's door. Curious Spike nudged it open and grinned. The ex-cop was hunched over the workbench absorbed in a magazine. Catching a peek at an oddly positioned foot. After a quick scan to verify Jet was only 'reading the articles', Spike cleared his throat and chuckled when the older man started. The jostle had him dropping the illicit reading material, centerfold open. He stood hastily while trying to grab the incriminating evidence.

A clunky boot attached to a smug smirk held the periodical in place.

"You act like you're twelve and just got caught with a…" he glanced at the image under his toe, "Oh you did get caught with one." His head tipped to get a more appropriate angle as he snickered, "Jet!" the leer grew, "I'm shocked. What if Ed or Faye finds this?!"

He ripped the trapped journal free, "Faye knows."

"Hmm… You should get the video feed from her at the bar then." Grin, "Right along the lines of," his head bobbed towards the crumpled booklet, "that."

"I tried, she had Ed erase the tape as soon as she came home." Grin, "Guess she was afraid you'd use it."

"If Faye's so worried about that stuff, what did she do when she caught you with some?"

Jet smoothed the crumbled pages and tucked it away under his largest bonsai, "She bought this for me."  
"What?"

Shrug, "She saw it at work and thought I'd get a kick out of it." He glanced at his partner, "The articles are actually pretty well written and the images, well done."

Spike felt a shiver of discomfort tingle up his spine, "That's gross."

"Huh?" Scowl, "Why?" He stood, "You've got all those racer magazines you keep hidden in that damn stash under your bed. How is this any different?" He shot an enraged index finger towards his stash, "Talk about the pot callin' the kettle."

Spike shook his head, "It's not the magazine, it's how you got it." His eyes narrowed, "What's Faye doin' buying you smut?" He dug for a smoke, "It's just wrong…"

"Ed found a few of your periodicals and Faye caught me flippin' through them after I took 'em from that damned kid." Shrug, "Guess she thought it'd be funny."

Spike flicked his lighter, his expression screaming: uncomfortable.

Snort, "You act like I imagine her in place of…" he ripped one of the magazines from the stash and flipped it open, "this." Snicker, "Sorry Spike, Faye half naked and sprawled across one of the monopods doesn't…" He lost his train at Spike's awkward shift. On a new track, he grinned, "I take it you have?"

"Have what?!" Twitch. Oops. Spike hated it when Jet decided to be observant and quick. He cringed internally, that defensive question would have the Black Dog's instincts on high alert. Jet's eyes narrowed, he smelled a lead.

In an attempt to steer the conversation back to solid ground Spike bumbled on, "Isn't she like… uh… well," he rubbed his head, "A sister to you or something?"

Blink. Derailed again, "No. If anything she's just one of the guys." Chuckle, "Granted, she cleans up better 'n most, but still, not my type."

Spike nodded, "Yeah, I know your type and it's definitely not a half dressed, full of vinegar and curvy."

Jet snubbed his cigarette, "Whatever." He glanced at his magazines' hiding place, "I think she did it to make me squeal." Grin, "She's been a bit bored since you've been down and out, so Ed and I became her targets."

"And?" Spike tapped out a smoke.

"Sadly, she failed." Shrug, "Guess you're the only one she can really piss off." He grabbed his scissors and began trimming his trees, "That or she was just being nice."

"Pff… Didn't take you for that kind of kink."

Jet grinned, "Takes all kinds." Chuckle, "Not all of us go for leggy tomboys in lingerie sprawled across a beat up monoracer." The scissors stilled, "Find anything to perk your interest as you rummaged through her drawers?"

Glare, "Ha. Ha."

Point, Jet. "So tell me what happened the other night when you two took down Mac Desviade and Nena Anat? Since getting Ed to dig up the security video isn't an option."

Spike settled against the door jamb, satisfied he was again on comfortable terrain. The capture two nights ago had been one of the more interesting adventures since he'd been back to bounty hunting form. He had met Faye at a tiny bar on the outskirts of Rhea. A common watering hole for the after clubbing set. Comfortable in their corner booth, she had pointed subtly at the pair when they sauntered in. Mac draped possessively over Nena, they settled in a table nearby. Testing the waters, Faye had sashayed past. The high, "I'm lookin' to get fucked" heels, and short skirt drew quite a bit of attention, especially when she leaned into the bar to order some obscenely named drink. Spike had shamefully stared as the tiny swatch of cloth crept closer to the curve of her rear. Drink in hand and tripping sloppily on the way back she plopped on the bench and slid close to him. Sure enough, the couple eyed her happily as they spoke in hushed tones. Spike smirked, when the man rose. They had taken the bait.

Mac grinned as he settled across from Nena. He jerked his shiny head towards Faye, "You let her play around?"

Faye giggled sounding bubbly, stupid and drunk.

Spike quirked a brow, "Depends on with whom." Grin, "You? Hell no." His head bounced to the buxom blonde, "Your girl," he took a languid sip as he carefully scanned the woman for weapons, "I wouldn't mind." He glanced at Faye, "Would you?"

She giggled.

The bounty's head bobbed appreciatively.

Faye tittered and pressed against Spike's side, his arm draped around the back of the booth- he hated it when Jet made them play a couple.

"Really Spiky?" She fingered a button as she cooed, "You won't mind?"

He repressed the need to distance himself and nodded, his hand unconsciously gripping the cracked and peeling upholstery. Chuckle, "Go for it. You've been checkin' her out since they got here. Have some fun, Faye."

The woman behind her squealed happily.

Spike grinned at the flash of worry that slipped across Faye's face. She hadn't been thrilled with the plan and now that she'd have to perform before a live audience she was even less inclined to follow through. Catching her reluctance he leaned close, "Enjoy yourself, sweetheart." Wink, "You know I do." And gave her forehead a soft kiss.

The slight twitch and sudden blinking forced a smug smirk to cement onto his face. He watched as her features set, she turned and let the girl have it. The bounty's appreciative gasp drawing the attention of the other patrons surrounding the booth.

Mac snickered, "Wow. No foreplay, huh?"

Someone in the peanut gallery breathed, "Damn."

Nena's hands had slipped to Faye's back in an attempt to pull her closer. Faye's still on the woman's cheek. Spike grinned as he watched Faye's hands slip lower, one drifting behind her back. He chuckled at the rattle of metal. Desviade leaned onto the table a pleased, unfocussed grin gracing his features. He sighed, "I love it when Nena finds a pretty girl to play with." He winked at Spike, "Keeps things interesting at home, you know?"

Spike's head waggled, he knew what the pair did to keep their sex lives interesting. The two had earned their sizeable bounties by luring unsuspecting couples away, where they would take turns torturing and mutilating their victims before tossing the bodies out into space. A high ranking member of ISSP had the displeasure of collecting the mangled remains of his daughter and her idiot date from the scattered debris around Earth a few months prior. When the bodies had been found and processed, the couple had bounced from decent bounties to one of the highest rewards in the solar system. Currently they were third and fourth on ISSP's top ten.

Spike's thoughts returned to the current situation when Faye moaned, causing both marks to shift appreciatively.

Spike scowled, it wasn't a pleased vocalization, more like dissatisfied grumbling. Muted cussing, and if he'd heard correctly Faye was not a happy decoy.

Nena's hands drifted to Faye's chest. Through playing, Faye caught one of the invasive appendages and yanked it to her lap. Assuming she wanted something a little more adventurous, soft fingers slid under the tight skirt. Spike snorted at Faye's stiffening posture. He watched as she calmly clicked the cuff over the distracted woman's wrist, shifted her weight to force Nena back, the bounty's leg drifting up to coral Faye. Uncomfortable, Faye snagged the woman's free hand. Instantly the bounty was bound, her boyfriend digging at his eyes. Spike watched as Faye set her drink back on the table, forced the girl off the bench, eliciting a pained yelp when bottom roughly met flooring. Satisfied mark one was incapacitated, she slipped around the booth and effectively trussed up Desviade. Pleased with her well done job, she dusted off her hands, sent Spike a victorious smirk and disappeared- he could only assume to wash her mouth out. Her gloating expression was tainted with an air of discomfort and disgust.

She returned minty fresh.

Spike snickered, "What'd you do, drink that mouthwash in your purse?"

Smile, "After I rinsed several times with the peroxide. Yes."

He swiped at the bit of foam clinging to her lip, "Missed some." Grinning at the nervous flush that enflamed her cheeks he wiped his finger off on his pants. Vainly Faye tried to keep eye contact, green quickly shifting to over his shoulder when his smirk grew the more evident her discomfort became.


	3. Ch 3: Rhythm of the Night

Sadly, I do not own the characters of _Cowboy Bebop_. They are the property of Sunrise, Bones, and Bandai Visual (2001). They make the money, not me. Nor can I take credit my chapter headings- they are the product of their authors.

Chapter 3: Rhythm of the Night (Debarge)

Faye snarled at the constant thump. Beat her pillow and rolled over.

Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap.

She knocked on the wall, "Knock it off, Spike!"

Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap.

Scowl, What the hell's he doing over there? It sounded like he was jumping on the bed.

Tap..t ..tap...t.. ap..t ..tap...t.. ap..t ..tap...t.. ap..t ..tap...t..

Shrug, _At least the rhythm changed._ She stilled; soft groans and heavy breathing trickling through.

"Uh…" and a long exhale drifted over.

Worried she grabbed her robe and crept into the dimly lit hall. Carefully easing towards the tightly closed door; pressing her ear against the thinner material she could easily discern the labored breathing and grunts. She waited, the noises were not pained; therefore, he probably hadn't reinjured himself. He almost sounded, tired. To ease her worry, she tapped the metal softly, "Spike?" another soft rap, "Spike. You ok?"

"F…fine, Faye. Mind your business."

She pinked, "I would but I can hear you! Could you…" she shifted, "Could you do your workout somewhere else?"

"No."

"But…"

"My room, Faye. You don't like it, move."

"Good grief, Spike, this is the third time!!"

"Then move!" snarled from the space.

She stared at the wall, deciding Spike had opted for a late night run through his exercises just to rattle her, she shrugged and puttered back towards her own bed. Idly wondering why he had been talking about her while jumping rope. Her shoulders bounced assuming it was some counting song. A slight grin tugging her lips, she'd never taken Spike as the playground, jump rope chanting type.

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Spike strained to hear Faye's movements. The door to the room over click closed. He was not a happy cowboy, he'd assumed she was asleep. Wary he listened as slippers slid across the floor, stilling when the bed began to creak and groan. He heard her punch her pillow, sigh, grumble about an insensitive lunkhead and burrow deeper below her bedding; the nightly ritual a part of his own routine. He remained stiff and wary, the soft sheen of sweat drying across his exposed back. Brown eyes swiveled to his door. That had been close. Too close. He'd awoken after a rather pleasant dream and decided, to deal with his frustrations for once rather than ignore it. A cold sweat replaced the warm residue of sustained completion when he discovered his lock had not been engaged. Cursing his laziness he scurried towards the exit, locked the bolt and returned to his warm bed. He **always** locked the door; it gave him an extra thirty seconds to remove any incriminating evidence or make some to hide what he was really up to. Irritated and in the need to vent he tugged on a pair of loose pants and grumped off to the observation deck- at least after a good workout he could relax in the shower.

-----------

Jet grinned through his coffee steam. Spike looked frazzled and unkempt, not all that unusual first thing in the morning. But the dark circles and irritated snarl indicated the cowboy had suffered another long night.

An eyebrow rose, "Faye making weird noises again?"

"No." Spike glared at the coffee maker, it was percolating far too slowly for his taste.

Snicker, "What were you so worked up about last night?"

Twitch. He forced, "Nothing." Through tightly clamped teeth.

Grin, "Have some pent up issues about a nearly naked, dark headed cowgirl strewn across your racer?" More mocking laughter, "Perhaps in one of those lacy articles you were fingering the other day?"

Angry eyes snapped to the snickering ex-cop, "You know that sacred line, Jet?" Spike's eye ticked.

Chuckle, "Which? The no asking personal questions line or the no indicating you have the hots for Faye line?" His face felt sore with all the grinning, "Or the fact you're a panty pervert?" Jet had to set his mug down at the convulsions his innocent query produced.

"Not…" Spike appeared to visibly force the appearance of composure- he failed gloriously, "funny."

"Says you." He took a pleased sip- mirth minimally checked, "I take it she nearly caught you."

The spasms increased.

Jet snagged his popped toast and absently began buttering the slabs of bread. "Get interrupted in the middle again and have a hard time finishing?"

Spike had turned away from the heckler, his focus on the slowly dripping machine.

"I'll take that as a yes." He began slopping jam across his breakfast, "That why you were up half the night working out and the other half in the shower?"

Grumble, "Not **really** any of your business, Jet."

"What's not Jet's business?"

Spike's spine became abnormally straight; he spun on the chipper woman and snarled, "If it isn't Jet's business it sure as hell isn't yours!"

Blink. She ignored the moody outburst, sparkling green eyes focused on Jet as her head bounced towards the man by the coffee maker, "You piss in his creamer or something?"

Jet nearly choked at the strained, garbled rant that filtered from her left. "No. He just woke up on the wrong side of the bed."

"That's the problem." she snorted, "He didn't go to bed. He woke me up because he was working out half the night and spent the other half in the shower." Her eyebrows snuck together as she took a careful perusal of the slightly spasmodic cowboy. Eyes narrowed, "You didn't hurt yourself again, did you?" She stepped closer, her hand reaching out to tug his forearm away from his side so she could examine the still healing wound.

Jet fell off the stool. Spike made an uncomfortably, pathetic blend of a growl and mewl and darted from the kitchen. Still rolling on the floor Jet couldn't console the shocked woman.

Her jaw realigning, gaze studying the offensive hand, she muttered, "What's wrong with him?" She glanced at Jet's mug, "Isn't he a bit old to be afraid of cooties?"

Tears dribbling down his cheeks Jet continued to giggle. It was just too funny, Spike was afraid of Faye because she was female, he found her attractive and constantly nearby, fussing over him; which went against his continual rant that as a tomboy she was an untouchable waste of two X chromosomes and a nice ass. He'd noticed Spike had been a little less interested in the 'of age' female population outside of the Bebop crew. Having caught several of the sideways glances or repetitious visits to the hangar whenever she had cleaning duty, he snorted. He had been right: Spike had a thing for Faye. The snickering intensified when he recalled the feeling was returned.

Faye stomped her foot, "Good grief! Whatever the hell's wrong with you two keep it away from Ed and me." She snagged a toaster pastry, "You two are acting worse than a kid Ed's age!"

The comparison only compounded matters and sent Jet into another bout of riotous laughter- she'd hit the analogy directly on the nose.

Faye spat, "I'm headin' to work!"

Jet's guffaws following her down the hall.

-----------

Spike continued, ignoring the cause of his predicament shuffling around and humming softly in the other room. He settled against the wall, the cool metal a nice pairing to his warm spine. His eyelids drooped closed. His last run-in with Faye flashed into his currently and constantly addled brain. She had popped her head from the bath, hoping to find Ed wandering. No kid in sight, she had ventured further into the hallway. Apparently, she wanted the teen to retrieve something. Spike had smirked at the steam heavy tresses, her face flushed from the warm water, one of Jet's bargain towels wrapped tightly around her. He groaned at the mental picture, he really needed to purchase a few decent sized towels. The scraps of material Jet had bought on sale barely covered the essentials and Faye had a tendency to run from point A to B in nothing but the scant swath of terry cloth. He had shifted when in her search for Ed he'd caught quite the indecent expanse of leg. Her exposed skin glistened in the sporadic hall lights.

He cleared his throat.

Green locked on him. He'd had to school his features to hide the fact he'd been ogling. She scowled, one hand on a cocked hip the other still holding the material closed. "You seen Ed?"

"Nope."

Her gaze drifted to her bedroom door, obviously trying to decide if she should just get what she needed. Spike swallowed as a few bubbles slowly wrapped around her legs on their slithering journey to the floor. The thought of clothing, that towel, even his hands taking the place of the insipid froth filling his mind with more images than his frantic pace could handle.

His head fell against the metal. He'd been jealous of that trail of suds, still was if he were completely honest with himself.


	4. Ch 4: The Shower

Sadly, I do not own the characters of _Cowboy Bebop_. They are the property of Sunrise, Bones, and Bandai Visual (2001). They make the money, not me. Nor can I take credit my chapter headings- they are the product of their authors.

Chapter 4: The Shower (Jed Davis)

This was the fifth night she'd heard him working out in his room. She frowned, _I wonder if…_ deciding that was dangerous territory she prepared for a bath. The soft taps and groans increasing pace. She shrugged, happily gathering the necessary essentials and drifting towards the steaming tub, from the sound of things Spike would be a while. With a tiny happy dance she scurried back, snagged her earphones and scampered off. She had a nice bath to take.

----------

Jet watched her several trips from his bonsai door, worry slowly burrowing into his thoughts. He caught her creeping down the hall, filling it with the whoosh of a filling tub. She then slunk back, to grab bubbles and returned adding them to the water. Worry was replaced by a snicker when she popped back out of her room with clothes, towel and lotions. He stepped further into shadow when she dropped half the pile. After half a dozen trips the hallway cleared, the door clicked shut. He waited for the soft splash, absently wondering why she hadn't bothered to lock the door. Deciding to keep an ear out for the impending explosion he disappeared into his greenhouse, the door cracked to catch every sound.

----------

Faye was in girly bliss. The tub was warm enough she could camp out for quite a while. Spike's previous rearrangement of her things had pushed her favorite soap to the front- she'd thought she'd lost it. She hummed to her music happily as she filled the poof and began scrubbing her leg. She draped it comfortably over the ledge and sunk deeper, the heat melting all her stress into a molten puddle of goo. She filled the sponge and allowed the water to run down her exposed skin. With a sigh she let her mind wander. Instantly it supplied her favorite topic. She slipped lower, her second leg popping out the other side of the bath. Her eyes closed slowly, as the music removed her from the clicks and bangs of the ship. Another languid breath as she recalled the day before. Spike had popped from the bath, half dressed and still wet. He hadn't seen her near the hangar hatch as he absently toweled his hair. A small smile tugged her lips as she blushed and sunk lower. She'd watched the few stray drops closely. Her mouth dry, afraid to move she remained rooted long after he'd sauntered off to his room.

She splashed another handful of water across her shoulders. Smiled, he always appeared so relaxed after a shower, the same way she pictured he would appear when… she giggled and sunk lower, her chin touching the water as she continued to daydream.

----------

Spike frowned and tossed the jump rope on the bed. He stretched, his back popping. Catching a whiff he decided a shower was an absolute necessity. He was well past the bothering Faye stage and into the realm of assaulting his own nasal passages. He skulked out of his room, shampoo, towel and clean clothes in hand. Still grumping over the strange turn of events he missed the sigh and soft splashing on the other side of the door. His hand tapped the switch. Still mulling as the door whooshed open and froze at the sight of a dripping wet foot. His gaze drifted up to the slender ankle and shapely leg attached. Survival instincts on high he back pedaled out of the room. The door hissing closed.

"Mmm… Spike."

He froze. Swallowed and nudged the door open a fraction. The leg shifted, the foot pressing against the wall for leverage. He blinked. He must have heard wrong. Another breathy moan, proved his hearing was in fact, intact. He leaned closer to the crack of light, spellbound. Shower supplies forgotten his hand drifted to the door frame. The water sloshed softly as the tub's occupant's breathing hitched. He followed the leg to the bath's edge. Brown following the silver ledge around to the pile of plum colored hair and soft curve of a shoulder. Faye's head was tipped sideways. Her hand slipped from the water, ran across her collarbone and slowly dipped back into the steaming liquid. Small beads of water slowly creeping back to the softly churning froth. Her back arched as a soft, needy moan slipped from her lips. He focused on the side of her face, her features relaxed, soft smile pulling on her lips. He grinned, when another wanton groan escaped before her bottom lip was pinched between her teeth as she concentrated.

----------

Ein curious why the cowboy was hovering in the threshold waddled towards the shaft of light and settled at Spike's feet. Soft brown eyes studied the cowboy's stiff posture, his head tipping sideways. Following the man's line of sight, Ein glanced in the room, his tongue lulling out in the process- nothing interesting as far as he could tell, just a foot.

Ed repressed a giggle at the strange scene half way down the hall. It was obvious Spike was watching something in the bathroom. Curious, she slithered next to him. His breathing was shallow, the white knuckled grip on the casing suspicious. She glanced in the room, just catching Faye's leg.

Another sigh trickled through the gap, Spike tipped closer. Her head had rolled back, the soft splashing increasing. "Nnn… Sspii…"

Ed blinked and hissed, "What is Spike-person doing?"

The cowboy jumped and slammed the door closed with a bang. The bathtub occupant yelped, the sound of toiletries pelting the water. Jet stuck his head out of the bonsai room to see what the noise was. He chuckled.

"Fuck!" Spike spun to glare at the teen.

She blinked and grinned back, "What was Spike-person doing?"

He twitched, "Eh…"

Blink. She could wait all day.

"Uh…"

Grin, "Yes?"

"Um…"

"Waiting, Spike-person."

"Er… playing lifeguard."

Ed's head tilted sideways, her eyes narrowing. "Why?"

"Well…" he shifted, "Can't have her drowning."

"Oh." She frowned, mulling over his logic. With a mischievous glint she studied the uncomfortable man. Grinning when his displeased shifting had him trying to pass her, she crowed, "Edward does not believe you, pervert Spike-person."

He clutched whatever composure he could muster, if he didn't he would **never **hear the end of it. "Most accidents happen in the bathroom, Ed."

Snicker, "Edward thinks Spike is full of it."

"Full of what?"

Blink, "You know." She grinned, "Spike-pervert is telling tales. Ed can tell!"

Shrug, "And?"

"If Spike-person was doing something legitimate he would not have jumped and looked guilty when Ed asked what he was doing." She nodded, "In fact, Edward believes that Spike was just being…" Her eyes slit as she jeered, "a dirty boy." Index finger stabbing at his personal bubble, "Edward was warned about men like you."

Spike smacked his face, his hand slipping off in an attempt to hold his tongue- composure be damned, the kid was askin' for it.

Jet cleared his throat, "Ed." He waited for the teen to quit baiting the poor cowboy, "Knock it off."

Her lip slipped out. "But…"

"Ed, let it go." She gave a quick nod and scampered off to interrogate the eldest cowboy in his bonsai sanctuary. Jet stepped aside to let her pass.

He chuckled, "Spike can't help it if he's a pathetic peeping tom."

Ed's voice trickled from the sanctuary, "We must support our despicable friend in his time of need, right?"

Groan, "Right, Ed." He shot the distraught cowboy a disgruntled glare, "Thanks, Spike."

Blink, "What did I do?"

Blue eyes shifted to the closed door, "Nothin' I'd want to get caught loitering over."

Twitch, Spike's gaze drifted back to the sealed hatch.

Ed cackled, "Faye-Faye will not let you peek again if she catches you! You fake lifeguard you!" Her volume increased, "Then you'll be doomed! DOOOOOMMMMED!!" The noise decreased to a mocking sigh, "No practicing rescue breathing with Faye-Faye." Titter, "He'll have to use…" snort, "the…" simper, "dog!"

Jet snickered, "Or his hand," and disappeared back into the greenhouse.

----------

Faye glared at the softly bobbing bottles. One had bounced off her head before skittering across the floor. She huffed, glancing at the offensive disruption. _How did I forget to lock…_ She blushed, _How long?Oh shit!_ Flicking the lock and snagging her wayward conditioner she quickly rinsed off, threw on some clothes and scurried off to bed. She didn't need to see Spike's smug smirk to know he'd been the disruption- she'd heard him cuss at the door. The blush increased, as she began hoping with every fiber of her being he had simply thought she was relaxing and had banged the door to be his usual vexing self and not because Ed or Jet had caught him… She couldn't finish the thought opting to carefully scan the hallway for crew. Empty except for the dog, she made a hasty retreat.

----------

Spike relaxed when he heard Faye's door click closed and her bed shift. She definitely wasn't coming out the rest of the night. Certain he could shower without problems or unnecessary confrontations he hustled to the bath, kicked the door closed and bolted it.

Immensely relieved the water was tepid.


	5. Ch 5: Tease me, Please

Sadly, I do not own the characters of _Cowboy Bebop_. They are the property of Sunrise, Bones, and Bandai Visual (2001). They make the money, not me. Nor can I take credit my chapter headings- they are the product of their authors.

Chapter 5: Tease me, Please (Scorpions)

Jet snickered at his two younger partners' antics. Faye avoided all eye contact, a soft dusting ever present when Spike was in the same room. Spike on the other hand, kept sneaking curious glances whenever he thought it safe. No one aboard had dared mention 'the incident', but it was apparent it weighed heavily on the two's minds. Absently Jet mused how long the bullshit would last, it had already been a week.

Faye shuffled to the toaster and mumbled, "I'm off to work."

He gave half a nod, expecting her to look up and acknowledge him. Instead she picked at her shirt and shuffled towards the exit.

He chuckled, "Have a nice day, Faye."

Ed popped from her hiding spot on the floor, "Yes Faye-Faye! Sell lots of novelties!"

The pinking spread to the back of her neck, with a flustered wave she fled.

Ed's head swiveled towards Spike, still staring at the exit. "What did Lunkhead Spike do?"

"Nothin'."

She crawled onto the counter, "Edward does not think Faye-Faye liked Spike playing lifeguard."

He tensed, "How'd she find…"

"AH-HA!" She stood, "Edward knew Spike-person was lying about keeping Faye safe." She jumped from the cabinet, "Edward was right! Spike-person is a dirty, pervert man." Her face soured, "Ewe. How does Spike sleep at night knowing he's a sexual fiend?"

"A what?" Shrug, "I sleep just fine."

She wrapped her arms around her body protectively, "Does Ed need to worry?"

Jet snorted.

Spike twitched, "That's sick, Edward."

Her eyes narrowed, "So is watching someone in the bathtub." Grin, "Didn't know Faye-Faye thought about Spike like Spike thought about Faye-Faye, hmm?" Giggle, the protective grip on her torso turned into an embrace, "Ooo Spike." Her hands wiggled, "Oh. Faye."

"Ed. That's gross."

"Perhaps with Ed doing it, but Spike wouldn't mind if he could really do that with Faye, does he?"

An eyebrow convulsed, "Ed. You have an overactive imagination. I want **nothing** of the sort."

She sniffed, "Ahh the whiff of a fiblet oozing off the deviant."

Jet choked on his sip. This had become Ed's favorite game- needle Spike. So far he'd been able to keep her relatively safe. It helped that she was excellent at disappearing when necessity dictated.

Spike's eye twitched as he glared at the unfazed teen, "Ed I haven't a clue what you're talking about."

More sniffing, "Ed smells fire."

The ticking increased, "You're imagining things kid."

Scowl, "No. Ed knows when she's pretending and Spike's extra eye blinks are not make-believe."

Spike dug at the offensive ocular socket.

Jet snorted.

Ed gasped, "See!" She grinned, "No you can't. Listen! Even Papa Jet knows you're full of it."

"Edward. Be. Quiet."

Snicker, "Nope." She back pedaled far enough he couldn't reach easily and pointed a pious finger at the simmering cowboy, "Ed knows you like Faye-Faye." Gold eyes narrowed, "Did Spike-person know he talks about her when he's really sleeping?" Gold eyes glinting, her voice dropping to portray his, "Come 'ere Faye." She tittered and made some stomach churning, wet kissy sounds.

Jet inched closer.

"Faye, you're…"

Spike lunged, plowing into Jet's mechanical arm instead. The ex-cop chuckled, "Usually I have to protect Ed from Faye." He bobbed his head towards the door, his signal the teen needed to make herself scarce.

She left a retreating barb at the door, "Ah! Bathtub shark! Save Faye-Faye you pervert lifeguard, you!"

Spike tugged at his jacket, melting back onto a stool. Jet scowled, "What's gotten into you?"

He irritably fingered his mug, "Nothin'."

"You know, Ed handles this shit better."

"Line, Jet."

"Pff… I'm sick of the lines. You've got so many fuckin' lines no one knows where to tread." His eyes narrowed, fist slamming into the table top. "Only one you're hurtin' is yourself, dumbass."

An eyebrow rose as Spike stood with a shrug, "Looks like you dented your counter again, Jet."

He glared at the fist shaped divot in the metal plating, "Son of a bitch." He caught Spike's back just as he turned the corner and huffed, "I need a vacation."

----------

Spike stilled; his leg parallel the ground when the hatch sealed closed. Faye was home and with that came the silly giggles from Ed, nervous side stepping from her, and the incessant need to soothe his curiosity. Jet snorted from the doorway, "She won't come back here." Chuckle, "New shipment came in, she'll probably be busy for some time." He glanced behind and shook his head, "Once she's done showering, she'll grab a cup of noodles and disappear for the rest of the night." He turned, waving a rolled up magazine as he melted into darkness, "It'll be safe in about twenty minutes but I'd wait thirty, just in case."

"She bring you a new smut rag?"

Jet ignored him, disappearing into his bonsais.

Spike scowled, he wasn't afraid of Faye. He just didn't feel like being social. Grumpy, he decided he needed a little more violent meditation.

----------

Dinner steaming in hand, hair still damp Faye floated off to hide in her bedroom.

Ed pounced, "Welcome home Faye-Faye." landing loudly in her way.

Startled she dropped her noodles, a puddle of broth and sustenance slowly spreading across the walkway. "Ed! What the hell?!"

Ein, well trained to the sound of a food falling rushed the two girls. Skidding to a stop between them, he immediately began slurping up the dinner. Instant ramen beat cold, gelatinous dog food any day.

Ed snickered.

Faye glared at her ever decreasing meal. "Grr… Ed! That was the last one."

Blink, "Make a sandwich."

Snort, "Why so I can drop that too?"

Giggle. "So cranky, Faye-Faye. Ed would think you had the same problem Spike-person does."

Scowl, "What's wrong with the lunkhead?"

"It awful," Ed's head waggled in mock despair. "Sad, really." Her head drooped to hide her smirk, "Faye would've noticed if she hadn't been so busy being embarrassed."

Faye's hand floated to her mouth, "What is it?! Did he open one of those wounds? Did he pull something again?" She clutched the teen's shoulders, "What is it Ed?! What happened?"

Sigh, "Heart troubles."

Gasp, "What!? Why wasn't I told?" She rushed to the medicine cabinet, "Was it something we missed from before?!" Gasp, "Is he still taking aspirin? He'll have to stop. It's a blood thinner!"

Ed bit her lip so she wouldn't giggle. "Don't worry Faye-Faye. Papa Jet says it'll fix itself."

"But…" Faye's frantic search stilled, "Edward, what's wrong with Spike?"

Shrug, "Like Ed said, it's his heart. Weren't you listening?"

Faye tugged her hair off her neck, "Yeah, I was that's why I'm worried. Where is he?"

Ed pointed to the observation deck, "He's exercising."

"WHAT?! But… but…" she kept shaking her head, unable to process why a severely injured man would go practice martial arts.

Jet's nose popped out of the lounge as Faye flew past. He shot Ed a warning glare and bobbed his head towards the bonsai door; Faye would kill her once the pieces fell into place.

----------

Faye tripped up the top step. Spike froze, eyebrow raised, leg slowly lowering back to the ground. She stood tugging her clothing back in place as she scanned the room. She frowned when she caught sight of him. "Spike!"

His eyebrow rose. "This isn't a dinner show, Faye."

She bounced from foot to foot, her expression pensive, eyes scrutinizing.

He chuckled, "Can I help you?"

"Eh…" she jerked a damp lock behind her ear, "Ed said you were hurt."

"Do I look hurt?"

"Err…" She gave him a quick once over. "No."

He grinned, arms crossing. "Anything else?"

She swallowed, "Uh…" blink, "uh…" shift, "no?"

He stepped closer, "You're sure?"

Her head spastically jerked up and down. 'The Incident' coming back full force as her face blossomed into a rosy tint.

"Positive?" He took another step.

Another hasty shake, her feet scrambling backwards to keep distance.

He frowned and froze, she'd successfully reversed her way out the door. "Faye be…"

She took another hasty step, panic quickly replacing nerves when her foot met air instead of floor. Gravity took control.

"Shit!" He lunged, just catching an outstretched hand before disaster. With a rough jerk, he sent her stumbling back into the room. The trajectory had set her for a head to chest collision. On autopilot, Spike's free arm began to wrap around her body as she fell. Realization dawning, he side stepped her decent and gave the acquired arm a rough tug.

Ashen she stood; her knees scraped and bloody from her slide across the floor. "Eh… uh… thanks."

Shrug. He opted to ignore the blush and let her scurry off to parts of the ship where she felt more comfortable. He grinned when he was sure she was safely hiding in her room.

Ed tittered from the hallway, "Ed saw you!"

"So?"

She sighed dramatically and pretended to swoon, "Who knew stinky, pervert Spike was a closet knight in shining armor."

Spike's lip curled, "Ed, get lost."

"Ooh. A cranky hero." She grinned, "Are we an antihero or just moody?"

Spike felt the twitch return, "Neither. Go away."

She drifted closer, "Ed saw Spike start to wrap his arm around Faye before he realized what he was doing and let her slip across the floor." Frown, "Why didn't you hug Faye like you wanted to, Lunkhead?" She twirled, "It would've been sweet! Like those squishy movies Papa Jet watches sometimes when he's lonely."

A masculine groan drifted from the bonsais.

Spike glared at the teen, but opted to remain silent. The last time she'd veered into this territory he'd let her dupe him into a verbal sparring match. He wouldn't fall for the same trick twice.

"Ah, Ed sees. You were scared." Her head tipped, "From what Ed has read about pheromones, Faye-Faye would not have minded hugging a stinky, sweaty Spiky." Blink, "In fact, it may have been to your benefit to let Faye-Faye catch a whiff of…" her hand drifted to her chest, her voice lowering to that of a TV announcer, "… your manly odor." Titter, "It's part of attraction you know. Though Ed is not sure what is so yummy about old booze and smoke." Her face curled in disgust, "Maybe you were afraid Faye-Faye has dissimilar tastes." A finger floated to chin, "Ed and Faye-Faye have talked extensively on what is cute." Nod, "Spike person is not what Ed would call cute. Ed likes nice boys with glasses. Faye-Faye likes naughty boys that slouch, smoke and drink." Grin, "Spike person falls into Faye's cute boy category. Doesn't that make you happy, Spike-person?"

Shift. _She's just baiting me, let it go._

Golden eyes sparkled from the dark, "Edward believes your silence is more telling than your yelling." She cackled and zipped away before the cowboy fully process what she had spouted.


	6. Ch 6: A Girl Like You

Sadly, I do not own the characters of _Cowboy Bebop_. They are the property of Sunrise, Bones, and Bandai Visual (2001). They make the money, not me. Nor can I take credit my chapter headings- they are the product of their authors.

Chapter 6: A Girl Like You (Edwin Collins)

Faye slapped another bandage across her shredded knees. Spike's attempt to save her from a tumble down the stairs had scuffed up her legs and banged up her hip. She swiped off another patch of drying blood. Her lip curling at the purpling splotch framing the wrap on her kneecap. She'd be sore in the morning. Grumping she yanked her quilt over her head, burrowing lower. She grinned, Spike had actually looked concerned. She sat up, quilt clutched tightly around her.

Had she imagined it? She hoped not. She scowled when she bumped one of the contusions littering her shin. Then again… getting tossed across the floor defeats any retarded romantic gestures that may or may not have crossed her stair stumble savior's mind. Deciding sleep was not an option she grumped out of her room to grab a sandwich and watch some mind numbing television. She just wasn't in the mood to see what swag H.M. wanted her to test- the new uniform for the upcoming sale was bad enough.

----------

Ed tripped past the lounge and doubled back. Faye was sprawled across the couch, an assortment of band-aids littering her legs. She scowled and crept closer. "Spike-person sucks as a knight in shining armor."

Ein wuffed softly.

Ed studied the softly grumbling woman, a bottle of something forbidden and a half eaten sandwich within reach. She slithered closer, grinning while Ein helped himself to the food. She poked a speckled leg, "Faye-Faye."

The leg was pulled away as the body turned into the couch.

"Faye-Faye." She hoped over the arm of the couch and landed on her favorite cowgirl.

Grunt. "Fuck off, Ed."

The teen gasped, "Not nice, Faye-Faye!" She plopped forcefully down on the unguarded hip.

"Ergh! ED!"

Snicker. "Did Faye-Faye know Spike person tried to hug her when he saved her from head planting down the stairs?"

She rolled onto her back, "No he didn't Ed."

Another aggressive bounce punctuated every word, "Yes. He. Did!"

The booze and crappy sandwich protested the violent treatment. With a rough push Ed found herself sprawling across the floor. "That's mean!"

"So's usin' my gut as a trampoline."

Ed sat up and huffed.

Faye sighed, rolling to upright. "What'd you want?"

"Oh!" Grin, "Papa Jet is taking Ed to Prometheus so she can ride the big rides," Ed crawled closer, "Will Faye-Faye come?"

Frown, "I can't, kid."

The dreaded lip slipped out.

Faye flipped it, "I've got work."

"But Ed will need help," citrine eyes darted around the room, her voice the smallest whisper, "James will be there."

"You plan this?"

Nod.

Faye giggled, suddenly **very** awake. "Does Jet know?"

She twisted the hem of her shirt, "Uh…" blink, "no."

"How would me coming help? You just need to spend time with him." She dug for a cigarette, "Shit, you two swap enough messages back and forth while you're diving…"

"But James does not see Ed!" she whined, "He just knows how Ed thinks."

Snort, "So he loves you for your mind, it shouldn't matter what you look like."

Ed pinked, not amused with Faye's commentary. She continued shifting. "Can't Faye-Faye help Ed look… uh…"

Blink, "There's nothin' wrong with you, just remember to take a bath and brush your teeth."

"But…"

Sigh, "Ed you'll be fine. Just be yourself. He already likes you…"

"But…"

Faye was finished listening. Tired of trying to appease a hormonal teen, she snubbed her smoke and returned to a reclined position on the couch. Her knees pressed against the yellow back.

Ed stomped, "Faye-Faye!"

"Good night, Ed."

----------

Spike flipped his towel over his shoulders and drifted down the hall. Ed had scurried off to parts unknown, giving him a free pass to his room and the shower. He was sick of her incessant game of needle the cowboy. He had never been a pin cushion and the teen's attempts to irk his ire were wearing thin, his outburst that morning was proof. He snickered, she'd been lucky Jet had stopped him. Even luckier that he'd decided to let Jet stop him because unlike Faye; he would have tied the brat upside down in a small space. Maybe a few hours bouncing around one of the tightly packed storage closets would mellow her out. He stilled, knowing Ed she'd probably get a kick out of it and end up retaliating in some abnormally offensive way.

"Damn kid."

Jet's snort stilled his progress. "You're chicken shit, you know that?"

Spike bumped the door open and glared at his partner's back, if it wasn't Ed it was Jet's unwelcomed, accurate observations.

"You heard me," he continued clipping branches. "I'm takin' Ed on a bounty tomorrow."

He shrugged, "And?"

"And we won't be back for a while." He set the sheers down and turned, a pleased grin and happy glint broadcasting he was thrilled.

Spike snorted, "You just want a vacation."

"Yup. Been plannin' this for a while." Chuckle, "We'll be on Prometheus for a bit. You and Faye'll need to hold down the fort."

"What's to hold down?"

Shrug, "Keep things running." He dug for a smoke, "Water the plants, feed the dog. That kind of thing."

"Maybe I'll just head out too."

Jet grinned, "No can do."

"Huh?"

A disturbing snap tore through the small space, "Because you're missing your ignition chip."

"Was that the one Doohan nearly skinned me for?!"

"Yup." It wasn't. But Spike didn't need to know.

"Shit." He glared at one of the bonsais, horticulture homicide weighing heavily on his mind.

"You touch one of my plants and I won't give you the replacement."

An eyebrow rose. A small grin tugging at his lip. He shrugged.

Jet took a drag, "You won't find where it's hidden either." A satisfied stream of grey escaping on his exhale.

The grin grew to a smirk. He knew Jet's hiding spots just as well as Faye, if not better.

Jet puffed, "It isn't under my bonsai, in my toolbox, the air vent, box in the fridge or the bag of peas."

"Hn…"

Jet blew a victory smoke ring- quite certain he'd finally gotten the upper hand on the two.

Spike watched him and snickered, "You hid it behind the outlet in your bedroom."

Jet choked mid-inhalation.

"By the way," chuckle, "You need to resupply your smokes."

"Dammit." He glared at the cowboy, "Locks don't work with you guys. Is anything sacred?"

Spike pretended to think. "My alcohol. My smokes. My… Hmm…"

Jet nodded, "Got it." He grinned, "Good thing I removed the O2 sensor as well, isn't it?" His eyes narrowed, "And it's going with me to Prometheus." He repressed the urge to spit out his tongue and gloat.

"Jet, you suck."

"No taking the RedTail either, Faye needs it for work or you'll run out of food."

Spike scowled, he still wasn't sure what she did at the novelty shop. Whatever she sold it kept Jet supplied with magazines and Ed snickering. He dug at his head a small thought taking root. Could it be? It would account for the occasional 'product research'.

Jet grinned at the flicker of comprehension that flashed across the younger cowboy's face. "Yup. She works in one of 'those' shops."

Spike lit up, "That explains it."

Jet stood, cracking his back. "Well, I need to pack and make sure Ed's set everything up." He herded Spike out the door and engaged the lock. "That kid's up to something, I just don't know what." He checked the handle, hoping beyond hope Spike wouldn't take his revenge out on the helpless flora.

"When isn't she planning something?"

Shrug.

Snort, "Enjoy the slots old man."

He sniggered, "Oh I plan on it."

----------

Ed had not been happy with Faye's womanly advice. She'd seen some of the pictures in Jet and Spike's coffee table appropriate magazines, had even read a few of Faye's. She looked nothing like the women spread across the pages. She tugged at her shirt again, Faye looked like the models. At least some of them in the racer magazines she'd come across. She grinned, if Faye looked like the girls in the magazines; that would mean she had the supplies to help Ed look similarly. With a devious little smirk she crept into the cowgirl's room. Eyeing the top of the dresser with pleased little dance. She boogied her way towards the numerous bottles, potions and other enticingly female supplies. Wiggly fingers reached for a pretty, glass vial.

"Ahem."

The teen jumped, knocking several bottles to the floor.

Faye's eyebrow quirked, "Can I help you?"

"Uh…"

Sigh, "Ed, what do you want?"

"Eh… Ed… Uh…"

"Uh…" she leaned forward, "Doesn't tell me what you want, Ed."

Nerves getting the better of her Ed began replacing the knocked over items, "Please help Ed be a girl like Faye."

She glared at the nervous teen before drifting to her bed. "Didn't we already have this discussion last night?" She watched Ed's nervous movements, well aware that the girl was no longer the gangly kid that had collected them two years ago. She was a young woman, and even though the two cowboys didn't see it, she was starting to look like one.

"Please, Faye."

With a sigh she collected what she needed, signaling Ed to settle on the bed.

She held up a silver tube, "We've talked about keeping clean right?"

Nod. She reached for the tantalizing cylinder, "What's that?"

Grin, "Part of your girly arsenal." She eased closer, "Hold still."


	7. Ch 7: Shame

Sadly, I do not own the characters of _Cowboy Bebop_. They are the property of Sunrise, Bones, and Bandai Visual (2001). They make the money, not me. Nor can I take credit my chapter headings- they are the product of their authors.

Chapter 7: Shame (Stabbing Westward)

Faye glared at the slowly filling pot of coffee. With luck she'd get her cup of liquid fuel and be out the door before Spike woke. The sound of shuffling and incoherent cussing instantly burst her bubble. She stared at the black liquid- there was barely enough to cover the bottom of her mug.

The noises drew closer.

She'd been uncomfortable around Spike since 'the incident', unable to speak to him directly without blushing like an idiot, school girl. Her only sense of consolation was Spike's disregard of her burning cheeks. She groaned, now that Ed and Jet had left she was forced to talk to him directly, no more messages through the kid. She eyeballed the dog, absently toying with the idea of a carrier puppy. Ein plunked on the floor, absently chewing his foot. Deciding it would be a wasted effort she resumed her glaring at the gurgling machine. Rolling her eyes, she could already feel the nervous flush creeping past her collar.

Spike turned the corner, catching her back and opting for a hasty reorganization of the third storage room below the hangar. It was one of the few places Faye refused to go. Her voice stilled his progress, "If you're heading anywhere besides the lounge, hangar, observation deck, kitchen, bath or either of our bedrooms you're out of luck."

"What?" He slumped against the doorway, idly fingering a smoke.

Shrug, "Jet closed up all the rooms except the main living spaces." She shook her head, "No air, heat. Nothin'. Locked the doors up too."

"Damn." He ignored the fact she wouldn't look at him.

"Yup." She glanced at him briefly the smallest smile fighting to be seen, "Guess you won't be able to hide."

Snort, "I'm not the one hidin', Faye."

She twitched before glancing at the clock, "Got to go. Later, Lunkhead."

Ein slipped between the slumped cowboy and retreating woman. One of them should get the hint that his canine belly needed food. He watched Faye duck through the hatch and turned his complete focus on the frowning man. Spike appeared deep in thought. Desperate he waddled towards his bowl and nosed it across the floor until it crashed into a clunky shoe.

"Huh?" Spike glanced at the floor, absently flicking his smoke.

Ein watched as the ash flitted in the air before landing in his dish. He plopped on his rump and tried to give the cowboy his best, 'Get a clue' look.

After dumping an unhealthy pile of kibble out for the dog, Spike went to work scrubbing the hangar. It gave him something to do while alone on the ship. Naps had become troublesome after Ed's announcement that he was prone to talking in his sleep. That's all he needed, Faye walking in on him in the middle of one of 'those' dreams. He rolled his eyes, smoke clinging limply to his lip. His comm chirped. A smirking Jet on the other end.

"Yo."

"Hey, how're things goin'?"

Eyebrow quirk, "Fine." The other eyebrow rose when Ed's happy cackle floated over the link. "You, uh, sound busy."

Jet nodded, a dark cloud drifting across his face, "Yup."

Smirk, "So how are the slots and dogs treatin' you?"

"Well." Grin, "I tripled my Woolongs."

Another riotous cheer.

"Ergh." The dangerous look returned, "Where's Faye?"

"Work, why?"

"Shit. I'll call back later."

Spike nodded, "Hey, Jet?"

He froze, waiting for Spike to continue.

"Why'd you lock up the ship?"

Shrug, "No need to waste energy on more than the necessary rooms." Grin, "I was generous too."

"Bull."

Chuckle, "I'm not the one upset I can't run away from Faye."

Spike growled, "Because you already ran, chicken."

"Boo…" another girlish giggle had him scowling. He grumbled, "Let her know I'll call back later."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothin' you can help me with." His gaze shifted to behind Spike's shoulder. A small head bounce, "Have fun cleaning the hangar."

Spike glared at the screen and spat, "Jet, you suck." He cussed. It was a waste of breath. Jet had already disconnected.

----------

The ex-cop glared at the screen. Ed's newest friend was giving him heart palpations. She told him she'd met the boy on the "Universe's Scariest Ride", a roller coaster that looked like a stomach churning decent to hell and back. She had ridden it fifty times in a row. Pausing only for a soda, snack and brief bathroom break. They, she and James, had supposedly met on her thirty-second time through. The pair had been inseparable ever since. Another squeal. Jet's fist clamped around the comm when flapping feet rushed into his room. He knew she wasn't being honest. She knew too much about the boy for them to have just met and her sudden attainment of lip gloss, mascara and hair gel implied Faye knew what was going on too.

"Papa Jet, Edward is going to ride some more rides with James-boy. Ok?"

Twitch, "Fine."

She shifted, her voice dripping to a whisper, "Can Edward call Faye-Faye later?"

Another twitch, he disguised as a nod.

"Yay." She rushed from the space, "Come on James."

There was a grunt.

Jet's blood chilled. He hated that kid, simply because he existed. Ed had never lied before that punk showed up. He glanced at his comm on the table, Faye knew what was happening and he'd get to the bottom of it, if it killed him.

----------

Spike contemplated in the direction of his comm, something was off with Jet. What, the question of the day. Not that it mattered, the old fart deserved whatever Ed dealt. He chuckled, it would be fun to learn the source of the ex-cop's obvious distress. Whatever it was should distract him from Faye. He scooped up the brush and began cleaning Swordfish. It was nice without the other bodies aboard the Bebop. The soft clicks, hums and groaning as the large ship floated through space a nice change to the usual banter, shouting and constant clicking of Ed's fingers.

Cursing Jet's cheap nature and need to save a buck, even though he was gambling a sizeable chunk of earnings on a vacation disguised as a bounty, Spike resumed his scrubbing. He didn't understand the immediate need to leave. He tossed the brush back into the frothy bucket. Glaring at the two empty spots where the Hammerhead and RedTail normally sat. With a sigh he dug through the water, retrieving the scrubber and resumed the meticulous cleaning. In an attempt to kill the silence with a tuneless whistle; the solitude suddenly becoming troublesome as his thoughts began to wander.

He paused in his scrubbing; the sound of the docking gate preparing to open alerting him that Faye was back. He waited for the RedTail to settle before he resumed his maintenance. She slid out of her ship, smiling slightly as she floated away. He stopped her at the hatch. "Jet has a problem."

She nodded, "Ed met a new friend."

"How'd…"

Giggle, "He's a little older and overly polite." She snorted, "I can't believe he hadn't figured out what was going on until he met the kid. She's been chatting with him for over a year."

"Huh?"

Shrug, "Surprised you hadn't noticed either." Grin, "I thought you prided yourself on your instincts, cowboy?"

"Faye, you know I don't know shit about little girls."

She turned fully facing the lanky man. "Haven't you noticed? Ed isn't a little girl anymore." More laughter, "I bet you,Jet's certain the poor kid is only interested in deflowering little Ed."

Spike stilled, the thought of Ed attracting boys, a cool venom rushing through his veins- he still saw her as an androgynous kid. "That's just wrong."

"Huh?" She giggled with a shrug, "It's normal. In fact," pause, "I think she's slower 'n most girls her age."

He scowled and sighed when the hatch clicked shut. It was a strange turn of events and not a welcome change either. Ed wasn't supposed to attract boys. He glared at nothing in particular, he'd been a sixteen year old boy once and instantly hated the kid. Regardless of his motives, he was certain Ed's new friend was up to no good- Faye was just too goofy to see it.

----------

Faye snickered when her comm chirped. Ed had been incessant with questions. Jet's cranky scowl filled the screen. "Hey Jet. How's the bounty going?"

He snarled, "Shut it. You know I'm not on a bounty."

Grin.

Blue eyes shifted off screen, "What do you know about Ed's new friend?"

Blink, "Who? That nice boy she met at the roller coaster?"

The image shook slightly, "Quit lying to me, when did she meet the little punk?"

"They've known each other for a while." Shrug, "He helped her with a few dives, they've been chatting for over a year." Her head tilted, "Why are you so upset?"

Ed's voice drifted over the line along with the chuckle of a lower, masculine voice.

Faye's eyebrow quirked, "He sounds cute."

Jet's complexion purpled as he spat, "I would not know." He tensed visibly, "Please tell me you taught her the dangers of men."

"What dangers?"

"Ffff-aye." It was hard to talk with his teeth clenched so tightly. "Stop fuckin' around."

She giggled, "Why the sudden change of tune?"

Jet's face melted from rage to confusion.

"I thought my sex were the dangerous ones." Wink, "Don't worry, she's fine. I checked the kid out myself."

He nodded, not pleased as he glared at the blackened screen. Faye's ability to gage danger was shaky at best. Deep in thought he contacted Spike. At least the lanky cowboy would understand his concerns. Faye was just too busy enjoying the fact Ed was acting like, like a girl! His face soured, it was just wrong. **Very** wrong.

----------

Faye rolled her eyes at the obsessive ex-cop and gathered bath supplies. Work had been nuts and her next day on the job wasn't looking much better. She hated the super themed sale her employer at the shop had come up with for the month of June. She gave an involuntary shudder as she remembered the staff meeting.

The strange, overly rouged woman had waddled out in front of them first thing that morning. Grinning, a halo of ratted hair encircling her pinched features, her thin lips pulled tighter, bright pink lipstick bleeding from the edges, making small spider webs around her mouth. Fingering a round of new products she passed each employee her chosen item, while explaining the upcoming 'June Jamboree.'

"It will be a wonderful time to boost sales," she rubbed her hands, "All those anniversaries, you know."

Faye had studied her newest package, using her tipped head to hide her eyes rolling. She could hear the strange, vamped up, Baba Yaga figure counting coins. She glared at the kit for couples, _How the hell's this supposed to help me?!_

"June brides that need to be satisfied." More cackling.

One of the women nearby Faye giggled, obviously pleased with her latest test assignment.

"It's the newest brand, dear." She smiled at her employee, "I know you'd mentioned that boyfriend of yours lacking in technique, this will help."

Blushing the giggling girl tucked the product away in the decorative bags, Nandi Tyren, insisted they use. She liked assuming the public thought her employees were the **most** knowledgeable in the universe. Her small shop catered to hundreds of people floating by on trips, work and the curious. She enjoyed knowing she had an extensive knowledge of how to help in the bedroom and was making great effort in instilling her wisdom to her faithful employees. Dismissing her crew she wrapped a withered hand around Faye's arm.

Frowning the cowgirl studied her employer. "Yes?"

"How have things been going with you and that cute roommate of yours?"

"Who?"

She patted Faye's arm, "The skinny one. The one you never talk about."

An eyebrow rose, "How'd?"

Chuckle, "You're littlest roommate likes contacting me. Quite the little diver that one."

"Ergh. I'm gonna kill that kid." She glared at the wall, "Is that why I started getting so many," her fingers rose in air quotes, "couples items I couldn't do a damn thing about?"

The elder woman snickered, "Well, I thought a little push the right direction would encourage you to branch out, if you know what I mean."

Faye's eyes narrowed, "Not amused."

"Actually, it's very funny dear. You just can't see the humor because you're a part of the joke."

"Ha. Ha."

"That's the spirit." She prepared to leave, "I need you to come in tomorrow too. Big sale, you know."


	8. Ch 8: Longview

Sadly, I do not own the characters of _Cowboy Bebop_. They are the property of Sunrise, Bones, and Bandai Visual (2001). They make the money, not me. Nor can I take credit my chapter headings- they are the product of their authors.

Chapter 8: Longview (Green Day)

Faye glanced at Spike's slumped form on the couch. Sighing she made her way to the hangar. Pausing at the grumble of her name. She huffed before returning to the lounge. She glared at the clunky shoe draped over the yellow armrest. "What?"  
"Pick up dinner on the way back."

She snorted, "Why? There's food in the kitchen, get off your ass and make something."

He sat up, grinning at the soft dusting that grew across Faye's features as his eyes roamed her form. She shifted slightly when he focused on her face. "Do you really want PB and J for dinner again?"

Huff, "Fine. I'm off just after seven, call in the order and I'll pick it up."

He nodded, satisfied he wouldn't have to get creative with the groceries on hand. Pleased and grinning over the easy win, he gave her the directions to the small take-out restaurant and settled into a comfortable sprawl. At least he had one thing to look forward to, there was nothing like Sid's.

----------

Jet cursed. Ed was up, chipper and far too concerned with contacting Faye. She'd gotten a hold of someone named Nandi over Tomato, giggled, babbled as she typed that: "Nandi-lady made a good plan. Toys weren't working so she thought big. He he, Nandi-lady is a genius." She froze when Jet grumbled into the main room of their little rented flat.

"Who you talkin' too Ed?"

She blinked, "Ed wants to call Faye-Faye." She blasted past him, snagged his comm and disappeared into the bathroom. The click of the lock signifying she did not wish to be disturbed. He glared at the blockade, tired of all Ed's secrets; Spike and Faye's were bad enough.

----------

Spike twitched at the soft chirping. Comfortable, he tried to ignore the incessant beeping. It continued, grumbling over the caller's persistence he answered with a repressed snarl. "Wh't!?" more a garbled protest than an actual word.

Ed blinked, "Where's Faye?"

"Work."

"Oh," her brows met, "But today isn't Faye-Faye's work day."

"Well she's workin'."

Frown, "Does Spike think he could help Edward?"

Scowl, "Depends."

"On?"

"On what you want help with? If it's that boy you've been hangin' with no can do."

"Hey!" She began to pout, "Faye would help Ed."

Spike's eyes glanced at his toes then back to the upset teen, "Do I look like Faye?"

She shifted gears, "Has Spike found the movies Ed left for you?"

"What movies?"

She grinned, "Ed found some more shows like Spike-person watched while he was getting better. Papa Jet thought you'd like to watch them while you were alone." Her eyebrows wiggled in a highly disturbing way. She stopped at his uncomfortable shift, eyes narrowing, "Perhaps Spike is afraid to watch what Ed found." Grin, "Not as good as Faye-Faye's bath, hmm?"

"Not afraid kid, just not in the mood to watch some bizarrely drawn caricatures get busy."

"Spike did not mind them when he was a mummy."

"I was on some pretty decent shit at the time. I probably would've enjoyed the shopping network."

She shook her head, "No. Ed tried the home shopping channel, Spike person said it was boring and to find him something with action." Grin, "Ed was not sure what action Spike wanted so she found a variety." Snicker, "Spike liked the grownup action ones Papa Jet grounded Ed from Tomato for watching." Her head waggled, "It was the first sign of Spike's true pervert nature. Sad really."

"What do you want Ed?"

Blink, "Ed said she wanted Faye. Spike-person said he would not help Ed with," She blushed, a small sigh escaping, "James."

"Errr… so the punk has a name?"

"Yes." She began educating Spike on how much fun her new beau was. The number of rides he'd taken her on, how he'd bought her a soda and won her a cute teddy bear. Every squishy, disgustingly sweet incident that occurred the day before; the cherry on the top was her girlish squeal at the fact James had held her hand to help her out of the roller coaster. She grinned, "Ed wants to thank Faye for helping her look a little more girly."

Spike scowled at the teen, she did look disturbingly feminine. He squinted at the small screen, "Are you wearing makeup?"

Head bounce.

"What the hell'd you do to your hair?"

Frown, "Ed combed it and used some goop." She fluffed it with her fingers, "Ed's pretty."

An eyebrow rose, "Sorry kid, I'm not a judge of teenage fads."

"James likes Ed," she cooed before disconnecting.

----------

The shop had been busy. Nandi's attempt to sell to June spouses a popular concept. The spring marital celebrants came in droves to buy up all the love potions and toys. Faye grinned at the amount she'd earned in commissions as she stepped into the small eatery.

"Sid welcome's you!" Greeted a grizzled man from behind the counter, "You pick up order or need make one?"

Faye frowned, "Uh… Called in."

"Name?"

"Spike?"

He turned, screaming something foreign through the small window. A negative response answered.

"No. No order Spike."

"Faye then?"

More indecipherable screaming.

"No."

She shifted, "The guy I live with ordered for us, can you just tell me the names…"

A woman from the back gasped and stormed from the kitchen, "WHORE!"

"Ex…excuse me?"

"You work in evil shop." A wooden spoon swung under her nose, "WHORE!"

Faye held her hands up in a placating manner, "Look, all I want is to get my food and leave."

The spoon whipped under her nose again. "Evil woman. Look at clothes." The spoon swept towards Faye's skirt, "Lots of leg. Not a nice girl. WHORE!"

Faye blinked, unsure what to do.

The man stepped close and passed off a menu, "Ignore Mama. She do not like my sister's shop."

"Why?"

A bushy eyebrow rose, "Hurry an' pick your food an' go away."

Faye snatched the proffered cardboard, furious. "Spike said you guys were really good."

The old woman inched closer, her spoon hand dropped to her hip. "This Spike, he Spike Spiegel?"

"Yeah," she rolled her eyes, _How many Spikes could there be?! _Biting her tongue she smiled politely with a nod, "He was supposed to call in our order."

The old man smiled, "Spike is good customer. Tall and skinny, yes?"

Nod.

He took the menu back, "No need to look, we remember what he likes."

Scowl, "Uh… ok. Um… just double it then."

The woman gave Faye a serious, soul searing once over. "If you Spike's friend you not a whore, but not good woman." Scowl, the spoon reappearing, "Stay away from my boy!"

Faye's hands went up in defense yet again, "I don't even know your boy."

The man bounced his head at a drooling teen wiping tables.

Faye gave an emphatic nod, "You've got my word, lady."

"Good." Satisfied the rotund hausfrau waddled back into her realm of bubbling pots and sauces.

----------

Showered, half dressed and very bored Spike plodded his way to the lounge. Collapsing on the sofa he kicked the view screen on with his toe and hoped to be numbed into a state of dulled, nothingness. Remembering Ed's little announcement from earlier he flipped to the video menu and grinned at the familiar flick. It had been one of his favorites while he recuperated. Chuckle, there was nothin' like gratuitous sex to help brighten an otherwise wasted day. Finding a comfortable position he flipped it on and settled in for a lazy afternoon of humorous, porn perusal. Grinning that with only the dog for company, it was a nice change of pace. The smile soon faded as he watched the female lead- this was not the same show and there was something familiar about her, disturbingly so.

Deciding it wasn't too bad and quite secure in the fact Faye wasn't due home for an hour. He grew blissfully comfortable as he relaxed to enjoy his unsavory entertainment. He chose to ignore the fact the woman on screen currently getting manhandled by a man in an ugly grey suit looked a lot like the focal point of most his issues over the past month. The actress moaned loudly, causing the cowboy to shift into a more accessible sprawl.

----------

Crawling from her ship was quite the hassle. It had taken Sid and his vicious wife over an hour to complete Spike's usual order. Granted, the food smelled great but the six bags of steaming whatever Sid cooked, plus her work swag was a bit cumbersome. Grumping, she staggered up the stairs, through the hatch and into the kitchen. Bags on the counter she huffed off to: one, throw her sauce covered blouse in the sink; two, scream at Spike until he was deaf for wasting her time getting his sorry butt food; and three, taking a nice hot bath to remove all the work stress that seemed centered on the third vertebrae of her neck. Hearing noise in the lounge she rounded the corner and froze, a scarlet tint quickly rising to her cheeks. The video had run its course, snow now filling the screen.

Otherwise occupied, Spike was oblivious to the soft thrum of static.

His eyes were closed, a light sheen of sweat coating his shoulders and chest. Faye started when he mumbled. Realizing she was staring and at what, she rushed back to the hangar and tried to get her bearings. She fanned her face nervously, _Was Spike just… Did he just say… Holy Shit!_ She pranced nervously to and fro before perching on the stairs, she needed a moment to collect herself. She hadn't expected to **ever** witness that. All the strange noises through the wall making sense. The blush grew, she hadn't misheard. _Oh crap!_ The blush grew. She flopped back against the cold metal, she could barely handle him potentially witnessing her bath, but there was no question what she'd seen. She took another deep breath and eyed the RedTail. Hiding wouldn't work- he'd figure it out eventually. Settled on letting the cowboy think she was ignorant she stood and gave a nervous stretch. Deciding to make do with somewhat composed, she slammed the hatch home, announcing loudly, "Lunkhead, I'm home!" She stomped into the kitchen and shuffled the bags violently, "I got the food! You could've called it in idiot. I was attacked by the owner, did you know he was related to my boss at H.M.? His wife nearly beat me with a spoon. Crazy lady called me…" She continued to babble as she banged down the hall, forcing her brain to turn off what she'd seen. At the doorway she cleared her throat, her attempts to forget failing, epically. Trying hard to ignore Spike's new position, she glared at the far wall. He appeared to be napping on the couch, several tissues littering the floor.

----------

Spike was just finishing when he heard the hatch bang. Panicked, he cleaned up his 'mess', threw a blanket over himself and pretended to be sleeping. Internally hoping she wouldn't notice he was sweaty or the tissues littering the carpet, and check him for a temperature. She had a tendency to fuss more about his health since she'd drug him back from that hellish hospital on Mars. Instead she hovered in the doorway, shifting as though she wished to be far, far away. "Uh… Food's on the counter."

He yawned and pretended to stretch, the blanket slipping off his chest.

Flustered, the blush grew as Faye back pedaled into the hallway. Intent on collecting some dinner and hiding out, "Get it while it's hot."

Scowling at her continually goofy behavior he scratched his stomach and puttered towards the take-out. Faye scurrying past with a plateful. He studied the cooling boxes, from the heat on the counter they'd been sitting there for quite a bit. Brown eyes snapped to the doorway. Curious, he slumped off to the hangar to check on the ship.

Yup, the RedTail was cool which meant Faye had been home for quite a while. His face scrunched in contemplation. _Did she…_ he shook his head, hoping that perhaps she had just gotten distracted on her way to the kitchen. _Probably tripped over Ein._ He caught the sight of her work shirt soaking, _Oh. She rinsed her clothes, that makes sense._ Satisfied with his reasoning he clung to it and made his way back to collect some kabobs, rice and flat bread.


	9. Ch 9: Grain of Faith

Sadly, I do not own the characters of _Cowboy Bebop_. They are the property of Sunrise, Bones, and Bandai Visual (2001). They make the money, not me. Nor can I take credit my chapter headings- they are the product of their authors.

Chapter 9: Grain of Faith (Geoff Tate)

Faye groaned at the incessant chirp. Ed had been rather needy since she met James. Oddly insecure in fact and constantly wanting to tell Faye what was happening. It drove the cowgirl nuts. Numbly grabbing for the noisy device, she flipped it on with a grunt not bothering to look at the screen.

Jet glared at the fuzzed mass of dark purple sprouting from a white pillow. "Faye, get up."

She moved, "What?"

"Who's this James kid?"

Sigh, "Some boy she met diving." She sat up, digging at her eyes. "He's fine Jet, a good kid."

He scowled, "When'd you meet him?"

Grin, "I was on a job." Yawn, "The one I sprained my ankle on."

Blink.

"Where I got my second job?"

"He's the kid Ed called to help you?"

She nodded. It had been a miserable hunt. Spike wasn't up to full bounty catching speed, so she was on her own. The meal ticket had ducked into a dark and narrow alley. Close on his heels and concentrating on his retreating back, Faye missed the crack in the cement. She fell hard, the bone jarring snap ripping through her body. Adrenaline on high she stood, determined to continue the chase, the mark's back just whipping around the corner. The moment her weight settled on the injured joint she collapsed in a pained heap. Desperate to catch the guy- they needed food, she contacted Ed; hoping the teen could find one of her many friends.

Ed's worried face popped on the screen, "What happened?"

Faye looked miserable, her face twisted in a sickened smirk. "Ed, you know anyone on this blasted rock?"

She frowned and began typing.

Faye waited patiently.

"Yes. Ed's friend is there." Blink, "Do you want Ed to have him help you?"

Faye ignored the rising blush and nodded. "Yeah, I can't walk and the RedTail won't fit in here, 'sides we need to catch this guy." Sigh, "Bills to pay."

Another nod.

"See if you can find where he's been spendin' a lot of his money."

Nod.

Grin, "I'll just wait him out there."

"Ok Faye. Ed's friend will be there shortly. Go to the grown-up toy shop around the corner, the bad guy stops by to pick up a magazine." Faye glanced at the end of the alleyway, a thin boy with mussed blond hair and glasses inched closer. He appeared nervous, twitchy and in need of a good sunbath and vegetables.

"You, uh… Faye?"

She nodded. "I take it you're Ed's friend… uh…"

"J… James." He held out his hand, "Nice to meet you." He smiled, "Ed's told me quite a bit about you, she sure thinks you're cool."

"I am." She studied him closely, "Are you the one she keeps messagin' at all hours?"

Nod.

Giggle, "Has she met you in person yet?"

"No." He shifted, "Neither of us get out much, and I'm too busy bouncin' from place to place so I won't get caught." Grin, "It's gotten easier though, Ed's been helpin' me stay under the radar." Sigh, "She's amazing."

"Yep, Ed's pretty talented." Grin, "Quite the catch."

His face flushed.

Faye's eyebrow rose, "You mind helpin' me up?"

Another blush as he tugged the cowgirl to her feet.

Faye rolled her eyes at his nervousness, "Can you help me hobble to the…"

The vexed tint darkened, "I know where you need to go, H.M. is just around the corner." He glared at the swelling foot, "We should get that wrapped up first, Ed said your bounty wouldn't be at the shop for several hours."

Nodding, Faye let the teen inch her out of the cramped space and towards his make-do hut.

"Sorry it isn't much, but it'll keep you out of sight, 'til you can catch the guy."

"Thanks." She grinned, accepting the ice and ace bandages he dug from his jacket.

"You… uh… ok?"

Nod, "Just a sprain." She grinned, "So tell me about yourself, you plannin' on takin' Ed on a date or you just going to keep messaging back and forth?"

The boy stiffened, suddenly pretending to be more interested in his computer than the beaming cowgirl.

She chortled, "I've got several hours to hide out kid, you might as well answer me now."

His head bobbed nervously, "Y…yeah. I just don't know when."

"Hmm…" she plopped the icepack on the freshly wrapped ankle, "You two should make plans to meet up somewhere." Eyes narrowed, "You just want to meet her, right?"  
He squeaked, "Of course!"

Giggle, "Just checking."

The rest of the day had been spent in relative quiet, poor James unaccustomed to incessant heckling and Faye growing bored of his mellow personality. She could rile him up but he'd instantly calm back down. He was the complete opposite of the Bebop's fiery hacker. She absently scanned the space for any drug paraphernalia, assuming the kid had to be on something to reach his level of sedate. She sulked when she found nothing, not even a dirty magazine or scantily clad woman draped across his desktop. He cleared his throat, "No. I'm not into drugs if that's what you're lookin' for and I prefer my imagination over photographs."

Faye snorted, "Too much info kid."

He blushed, realizing what he'd done and instantly began to stutter, "It's not… I'm not… I don't… I… I…"

"I would be more worried if you didn't."

He swallowed, Faye was nothing like he'd imagined. He thought she'd be distrustful and wary, mean even. Instead she was somewhat fun, laidback and if he wasn't mistaken glad Ed and he were friends.

Faye winked, "Ed's a skinny redhead with gold eyes."

His pink heightened to painful vermilion.

"She isn't as tall as me," she eyeballed the teen, "Probably'd reach your chest and is full of energy."

Nod. "I could tell that much." He shifted nervously. "What are Jet and Spike like?"

She snorted, "You're screwed kid." Smirk, "Just be yourself and realize Jet's goin' to hate you no matter what and Spike won't trust you, ever." She smiled kindly, "But don't worry kid, Ed pulls a lot of sway; especially with Jet." The smile vanished. James suddenly realizing that though she appeared fun the biggest threat aboard the ship was sitting across from him. Her voice dripped with venom, all play gone, "Here's the deal kid, the second you pull something sneaky on Ed, Spike and Jet will be the least of your worries." She leaned closer, "They'll thump on you and forget about you, I'll make your life miserable." She leered at the slightly shaking teen, "And I'll teach Ed every trick in the book to make any future relationships you want a living hell." She eased back in her seat, "We clear?"  
"Y…yes…ss… Ma'm."

"Good." She smiled, "No pullin' anything Ed doesn't want." Eyes narrowed, "She's the boss when you two hang out, got it?"

His head bobbed spastically.

Faye sighed, "I'm glad we had this little chat, aren't you?"

He swallowed.

----------

After the little meeting the bounty was an easy catch. Rather anticlimactic, if Faye were honest. She had simply talked the shop's owner into letting her borrow a shirt as she took on the role of new employee. She must have impressed the crumpled woman because after ISSP had hauled the mangled man cuffed to the magazine rack away she'd offered the cowgirl a job.

Cackle, "You know your way around a vibrator girl, and I could use a good sales person like you, you know."

Faye frowned and tried to hobble to the door.

Nandi passed off several shirts and a small bag, "Come back next week, I only need you part time, but the pay's good and you get a commission."

Faye peeked into the bag and blushed, she'd worked very hard to keep her familiarity of such things a secret, but the crew needed food so she'd let her undisclosed knowledge show. The old woman patted her arm, "Ain't gettin' it from who you want are you?"

Faye shifted.

"Well, I pay quite well and it's steady work, you know." She winked, "It'll keep you fed and since it's only part time you can still take out the bad guys that bring in a little more, you know." Chuckle, "Besides, I like the way you handled that man. I get a few rough customers and it's good to know I got a few tough folks on my payroll to handle 'em, you know."

Faye nodded.

"Good." She cooed, "See you Monday." And herded the limping cowgirl out the door.

----------

Jet glared at the screen, how could Faye be so unconcerned. It was like she trusted the kid or something. "Faye he's…"

"A normal sixteen year old boy." Green eyes bore through the link, "He's fine. He won't pull anything on Ed she doesn't want." Her lips curled in a frighteningly, territorial snarl, "Trust me."

"Trust you! **TRUST YOU!!**" His eyes squinched shut, "Faye I just caught our upstanding suitor coming out of **my** shower."

Faye grinned and mumbled, "Damn, way to go Ed! He's a cute one." She couldn't help but pick on the over protective cop. Her eyebrow quirked, "Did you check the trash for a used condom?"

He pinked.

"I gave her a handful." Grin, "We even practiced on the produce."

His expression darkened, "Faye that's sick, she's just a…"

She groaned, he was taking this way too seriously. "Where's Ed, Jet?"

Derailed, "Huh?"

"Tell me where Ed is. What does she look like? Does it look like she just got out of the shower or finished doing whatever your depraved mind has supplied?" Eyes narrowed, "Takes two to tango doesn't it?" Grumble, "If she'd joined him there'd be proof. Fuck! I thought you were a cop, do some leg work before jumping to conclusions."

"Eh…" the background shifted. Jet reappeared looking slightly chastised, "No. She's on Tomato."

"Dry?"  
Nod.

Faye's eyebrow rose, "Ever think the kid might just have needed a bath?"

"Why didn't he take one in his…"

"The kid's a transient, much like Ed was." She snorted, "Not all kids adopt themselves into well adjusted groups like ours." She dug at her head, "Another thing you sick old fart, not all boys are interested in just fucking the closest girl available."

Jet blinked.

"I told you I've dealt with any issues that may arise. He won't do **anything** without Ed's explicit permission and Ed is well aware of what could happen if she's stupid. Trust me," Her eyes narrowed, "Ed, James and I have talked; and they both understand the repercussions." Green seared him through the screen, "He likes her, a lot. He isn't going to screw it up, just to get some."

"Huh? But…"

"But what?!"

"Ergh." Still not satisfied he disconnected. Spike would see the light. He was a teenager once, he had to. He glared at the blackened screen. Faye was clueless, how could she remember being a fifteen year old girl, she'd lost her memory for Christ's sake!

----------

Spike groaned and glared at his upset partner. "What is it now, Jet?" He mentally griped, _I thought vacation meant you stayed clear of those you left._

"It's that kid, Spike."

"And?"

"I just caught him coming out of **my** shower."

"What?!" Spike, wide awake now, glared into the screen, "Did you beat the shit out of him?"

"No."

His head shook, unable to comprehend Jet's uncomfortable pause.

"Faye doesn't think there's anything to worry about. Says she's dealt with the issue."

"But…"

Sigh, "I know." He glared at the pair through the doorway, "How can she be so unfazed about Ed with a boy?"

Shrug.

"I just," Jet groaned, "I just don't know what to do."

Spike's face scrunched in thought, trying to remember how the more attentive parents dealt with his interest- it was hard, he usually went for older girls. "Just make yourself highly visible."

"What?"

"Let the kid know you're watching him and you're armed."

Nod.

"He'll get the hint and keep his grubby paws to himself."

Frown, "You're sure."

"Quite."

Jet grinned, "We speakin' from experience, Spike?"

Shrug, "Perhaps."

----------

Faye clutched the bag to her chest and paused. She had followed the sound of heavy breathing to the observation deck. Catching Spike mid workout she slipped back into the darkest shadows and watched. It was obvious he was finishing up, his back and shoulders glistened, his damp hair stuck to his forehead in clumps. He focused on his image in the glass, his expression intense, contemplative and analytical. He repeated the kick, obviously unhappy with the way it was executed. She remained rooted in the gloom, watching, waiting for him to start his cool-down so she could scurry away undetected. He kicked again, the second leg spinning around the moment the first touched down. The move was duplicated, a smug smirk creeping across his face. Apparently he was finally satisfied, swiping for his ever present towel and flipping it across his shoulder. Taking it as her cue, Faye inched away.

Spike kept his back to her, but grinned at the reflection in the darkened glass. He chuckled, stilling the hasty retreat. "You like the show, Faye?"

Her package crackled, face pinking. She remained in shadow, but he could tell she was far from pleased. Her hip cocked, the sound of crinkling paper filling the silence. "Please," she scoffed, "I was just trying to find out what Ein was up to." She grinned, "Sounded like he'd eaten one of your filthy socks again."

Spike turned slightly, studying her from his periphery. "Really, it took you that long to figure out I'm not Ein? Damn, I've heard of slow but come on."

She huffed, "Well, the similarities are uncanny."

His lip tugged upward, "Must be, he's behind you." Brown snapped to the inconspicuous bag, "More retail to test, Faye?"

She twitched slightly, "Uh…"

Snicker.

Her eyes narrowed, eyebrow quirking, she grinned. "Actually cowboy, it is." She crept into the light. Her hand dipping into the package, "I'd be more than happy to help you find something to make your couch time a little more comfortable." Her voice dripped with sex, "It is my job, you know."

He stiffened, "Really?" He dug for a smoke, trying to hide the flush and earn some time. Back still to her, "Helped with your bath times, didn't it?"

She gasped. "You were…"

Shrug, "So'd you."

Trying to regain her lead she giggled, "Actually, I haven't used anything from work in the bath?"

Spike chuckled and lit up, "Really," an exhale of grey, "Damn. I may take you up on that offer then, from what I could hear you've learned quite a bit."

The package crinkled as she slunk back into the darkened corridor. No longer visible in the window she spat, "You were in a public place, I was in the bathroom."

Chuckle, "Didn't bother to lock the door did you?" He flicked his lighter absently, "Almost like you wanted to be found."

A shocked hiss escaped her lips, "At least I wasn't sprawled across that ugly ass couch jackin' off lunkhead." Her eyes narrowed, "How do you even know what I was doing?" Grin, "I use a lot of bubbles, I might have been scrubbin' my toes when you were peeking and your sick, twisted, degenerate mind turned my wholesome, relaxing bath into something to spur your own limp drives."

Snort, "It's common knowledge you feel relaxed after…" grin, "All those happy endorphins, you know?"

"Hmm…" Grin, "You must be doin' it wrong then, fucktard." Cackle, "You seem far from relaxed lately."

"What?"

She scoffed, the click of heels clacking down the walk. "You heard me, ass." She paused, to turn back. A mocking sneer as she teased, "Your handwork may be lacking, but your ears work just fine." A door hissed closed, protecting her from a rebuttal.

He snarled at his cigarette, it was a waste of a good smoke. Grumpy, he dropped it on the floor and skulked to the shower. "Scrubbin' your toes, bullshit."


	10. Ch 10: Game of Love

Sadly, I do not own the characters of _Cowboy Bebop_. They are the property of Sunrise, Bones, and Bandai Visual (2001). They make the money, not me. Nor can I take credit my chapter headings- they are the product of their authors.

Chapter 10: The Game of Love (Santana)

It had been a few days and Ed had made it difficult for Jet to keep track of her and James. He'd given up after she tricked him with a cute girl and caramel apples. Like a faithful guard dog he'd followed the pair of divers all over the annoying amusement park- he'd even rode bitch on the tunnel of love ride. He shook his head over having assumed Spike's advice more helpful than Faye's 'let them be, I've dealt with it'. He frowned, distrust was becoming highly overrated.

Ed giggled, watching him carefully, unfazed by his hovering.

"What is it Ed?"

"Why is Papa Jet not risking his money in a high stakes game?"

"Huh?"

"No money on the doggies?"

"No. I'm going to hang around you two."

"Why? Can't you find friends your own age to play with?"

"Uh… I just felt like…" his focus shifted to the cute concessions girl selling caramel apples.

James smiled, "You sure it's a good idea Ed?" He inched closer.

Jet cleared his throat, chasing the boy back half a foot.

"Yes. It is just Ed's safety system. No one should get hurt." She slid next to the boy and grinned.

Jet frowned, "What's going on, Ed?" He couldn't chase her away, she wasn't properly afraid.

"Edward set the Bebop up to close all unnecessary spaces to save energy, just in case everyone got sick like that one time."

"Oh." He didn't understand what was happening.

James shook his head.

She sighed, "Bebop will slowly close all but the three communal rooms if Ed is not there to routinely input specific commands." She studied the eldest cowboy, "When the gloop attacked, everyone was sick except sleepy Ed. After that, Ed decided to set up a system that keeps everyone in one place. Warm and safe. That way no more finding Faye-Faye asleep in the airway and Spike-person under the Hammerhead." She giggled, "He had a lump on his head for a week. Lumpy, Lunkhead."

Jet shook his head, "How'd?"

She blinked innocently, "Edward forgot to turn it off. He he."

James grinned, "More like you were reminded to not shut it off, Eddy."

She blushed and made a swipe for his mouth, "Shh!"

"AHEM!" Scowl, oh how he hated the saccharine cuteness , "They better not kill each other Ed or you're cleanin' up the mess."

She eeped and changed the subject to the cute girl she'd spied Jet eyeing. Her eyebrows wiggled playfully, "Edward feels like burnt sugar apples, what about you James?"

"Eh…"

She bobbed from foot to foot, "Papa Jet, buy Ed and James an apple so you can talk to the pretty lady."

The cowboy froze a blush rising to his cheeks.

Ed pushed him, "Go on or Ed will go and tell her you think she's…" she gasped, "Papa Jet! She just smiled at you, that's a good sign. Ed knows! Ed's a girl and that's what Ed would do!" Another push, "Go. GO!"

The ex-cop's hesitance was all she needed; latching onto a startled James's hand she tore through the crowd, slipping into the line for the haunted house.

"Ed…"

"Shh… do you want a cranky Jet with us all day?"

"Uh…" she was right, but he wasn't in the mood to deal with the angered man.

She squeezed his hand, "No worries, Ed likes you and Faye-Faye trusts you. You're safe."

He'd quit listening after 'likes you'. His voice cracking, "Really?"

"Uh huh." She tittered, he was just so cute!

-----------

Jet collected the three apples from the curvy brunette with dimples- she was much nicer on the eyes up close. Grinning he made his way back towards the spot he'd left the pair. His blood pressure crept up, _Where'd they?_ Scanning the crowd he scowled, he'd been duped by a kid. Furious he called Faye, she obviously more knowledgeable though he was loath to admit it. His temper grew when she didn't answer. _Dammit!_

He prepared to toss the apples, just catching the brunette watching him closely. He waved and sulked off, dumping his collection when he was certain he was out of sight. He glared into the crowd. With a shrug he headed for the exit, _Guess I'll go burn some steam at the tracks, damn kids goin' to get an earful when she gets back._

----------

He stared at her from across their dinner prepared to give him the lecture she deserved. Unfortunately, Ed had taken a page from Faye's book and twisted the table. Accusing him of leaving her. "Ed went on the ghosty ride while Papa Jet flirted with the apple lady. When James and Ed came out Papa Jet was gone." She blinked at him, "Ed thought you were bored of playing with us so she decided to let you go."

"Whatever Ed." He glared at her.

She grinned, "Did Papa Jet win a lot at the doggy race?"

His eyes narrowed, "How'd you?"

Giggle, "Ed checked on you."

Blink, "Oh."

She inched closer, "Why doesn't Papa Jet check on Faye-Faye and Lunkhead Spike-person." Titter, "Make sure there is no blood."

Nodding he numbly wandered away in search of his comm.

----------

Still angry with the idiot cowboy, Faye collected her things and stormed to the shower, the bag forgotten by her door. Her hand clutched the latch, she grumbled, "Scrubbin' my toes? He'd have to be stupid to buy that bullshit."

Spike stilled, toothbrush hanging limply in his mouth. He ignored the intruder, he was covered. He snorted at Faye's irritated gripe transferring into a startled gasp.

"Good thing I'm not stupid, huh?"

She dropped her pile with a startled gasp.

"Come back for seconds, Faye?"

She swallowed, gaze flickering at various intervals from head to toes.

Another chuckle, "Like what you see?" She twitched, back peddling through the door. Spike shrugged and resumed his brushing, "Most people knock before barging in, Faye."

Her head gave a numb bob as she attempted to scurry off to the RedTail. A reverberating thump, followed by a pained groan overwhelming the Bebop's natural noise. Curious Spike peeked at the sprawled bump on the floor, toothbrush limply dangling from his lips. "Door's closed, Faye."

She stood, slightly wobbly. "It's locked."

Scowl, "Can't be, we can't leave if it's…" he marched down the hallway and tugged on the door. When it wouldn't respond, he kicked it. "Huh. It's locked." He spun at the sound of the bathroom door hissing shut, his toothbrush clattering to the floor. Still wrapped in his towel he wandered towards his room. He needed to find out why he and Faye were suddenly prisoners on the floating hunk of metal. After tugging on bottoms he snapped his comm open. Surprised to see an equally shocked Jet glaring back.

The elder cowboy gained his composure first, grinning. "Yo Spike. Glad to see you and Faye haven't killed each other yet."

"Not yet, Jet." His eyes narrowed, "Why can't we access the hangar?"

"Oh… uh… Ed's safety protocols start closing down unnecessary rooms if she isn't there to apply the proper codes."

"Why can't she do it with Tomato."

"Don't think she wants to." He rubbed his beard, "We should be back in a few days. Just keep in mind that everything will lock up except for the lounge, toilet and kitchen."

Nod. "Got it."

Grin, "So anything interesting pop up while we've been gone?"

Spike flushed minimally.

Jet snickered, "I take it from your tiny blush that Faye caught you watchin' those videos Ed left for your perusal."

"No. She didn't catch me watchin' the videos."

An eyebrow rose, suddenly curious. "So what'd she catch you doing that's gotten you all frazzled."

"There was a couch incident."

The screen wobbled, "You're kidding me! Ergh. I'm never sittin' on that thing again."

"Whatever."

More snickering, "You're just chicken shit."

"Whatever." The screen blacked.

----------

Cranky, Spike settled on the couch. If he was going to be trapped in the room he damn well was sleeping on the most comfortable space. Faye could go crash under the kitchen island with the dog for all he cared. She stormed into the room, a tiny bathrobe wrapped around her.

"Why can't I get to my room?" Her eyes narrowed, "What did you do?"

"Nothing."

"Bull."

"Ed's safety measures."

"But… I need clothes." She flapped her arms in frustration, the thin fabric slipping from her shoulder. "Dammit!" She flopped her head to the side, her hand digging at the knot of stress building there.

Spike's eyebrow rose. Brown eyes snapping to the expanse of skin, his traitorous brain supplying the last time he'd seen her in that position. Trying to hide his grin, he dropped his feet comfortably on the couch. "This is my problem, why?"

She stomped, "Fuck you!"

Snort, "Based on the look you gave me earlier that's exactly what you want to do."

Her spine stiffened as her hand slid the fabric back where it belonged, "No. Just checkin' your scoliosis." Her head tipped sideways, "You're hangin' a bit crooked."

"I'm sure you're the expert, Faye."

She pinked, slinking off to find solitude in the kitchen, "Ass."

Not finished heckling the woman, Spike followed her down the hall. Pausing just long enough to snag the bag innocently propped by her door. Curious he peeked inside and grinned, not what he expected but he'd make it work.

She jumped when he strutted into the small space, a partially doctored piece of bread in her hand, the butter knife in the other. Her eyebrow twitched, "May I help you?"

He settled in a stool and grinned, "Yeah, I think you can." He tipped the bag, letting its contents roll across the table. "What's this stuff."

She began slapping meat across the slice of carbohydrates, "You can read."

He fingered a bottle, his eyebrow raising slightly. "Says it's a multifunctional, formula made to enhance stimulation…"

The sandwich prep became violent. "I know what it says, I sell the shit."

"Huh. High quality merchandise then, isn't it?"

"Shut up." She slapped the second piece of bread atop her pile of meat and lettuce.

Grin, "You still going to show me how I can make my couch time more enjoyable with this Faye."

She pinked, "No need, you can read why would I waste my breath."

Shrug, "Afraid?"

Snort, "No. Just being smart." Her lip curled, "God knows what you're carrying."

"You do," smirk, "You keep close enough track of me."

"I… I do not!" She skirted the island, veering for the doorway, "I'm merely keeping the health of my shipmates in mind."

He stood, blocking her escape route, "Sure you are." He snagged half her sandwich.

----------

Jet glared at Ed across the small room. She seemed sad, James had left that morning. "Relax kid, you'll see him again."

Sniff, "Ed knows."

He shifted, "You think you could stop the ship from locking Spike and Faye out of their rooms?"

She typed a few commands, "No. Spike-person's room was never in the system. The lock is broken, remember?" Grin, "He uses that funny deadbolt thing."

Nod. "I wonder if he'll remember that."

Snicker, "Faye-Faye will."

----------

Faye glared at the retreating back, trying to decide where to hide out for the next couple of days. The tub was out of the question, so was the kitchen. She frowned, she wouldn't be able to hide in the lounge either that's where Spike had opted to camp. Nibbling idly on her hoagie she studied the hallway. Where to go? Where? Hmmm… A satisfied smirk appeared when her focus landed on the bedroom door slightly ajar. Clapping happily she silently skipped down the corridor and into the open room. Satisfied she'd have a bed to sleep in, she helped herself to some clothes, pounced the mattress, curled up and drifted off.

-----------

Spike remained flumped across the couch waiting for Faye to charge after. When she didn't appear he assumed she'd admitted defeat and was off sulking in the kitchen. _She'll come soon enough,_ he thought with a smug smirk. Slipping lower he prepared to wait. Sleep eventually took over; and he began to doze.

Several hours later, Spike woke with an irritated scowl. The room was chilly- no scratch that- cold, damn cold. Blinking he glared at the dimly lit space. Low power, emergency lights illuminated the room in a soft yellow light. Slightly worried Faye had gotten locked in somewhere he stood and made his way into the hallway. Shivering slightly he crept towards the kitchen. Scanning the space he glared at the dog momentarily before heading to the bath, _Maybe she decided to crash in the tub._

The door swished open. A quick glance told him the room was empty. Digging at his scalp he went back to the lounge and glared at the four walls. She wasn't there. He grumped back into the hall, brown locking on the slightly ajar door. Curious he inched closer. A small sigh escaping at the sight. Faye was warped into a chilled ball under his covers, her bathrobe draped across the bed post. Interested in what she was sleeping in, he tugged the blanket up and frowned. She was happily dreaming in a pair of his shorts and undershirt.

He kicked the bed, "Move it Faye."

She rolled, used to such ill wake-up calls.

More kicking. "Up, out of my bed, Faye."

She burrowed deeper, "No thanks. I found it."

He settled on the footboard and jerked the blankets off. "NOW."

She followed the roughly pulled material, crashing into and launching Spike off his precarious perch. Still partially asleep she swiped at him. "Dammit Ed! I was having a good dream too."

He caught her hand and snickered, "'Bout what Faye?"

She blushed, "You know, Sp…" she blinked. Finally comprehending who she was straddling, "…it." Nod. "Lots of spit. It was awful. I nearly drowned."

Grin, "Bullshit Faye." He fingered the bottle and sat up, "You going to show me how to improve my couch time?"

She tried to inch away from the little jar promising better sex. A hand snaked behind her. "Hold up, cowgirl." He tugged her back, "Answer my question, you goin' to show me or not?"

Snort, "Not."

"Huh," his grip increased, "Is it you that needs the pointers?"

Her eyes widened, "No. I'm…" Her thought process slipped off course when the other hand wrapped around her and pulled her flush.

His breath whispered across her exposed shoulder, "Prove it."

"Uh…"

He leaned closer.

She froze, eyes wide. "Uh…"

"Faye?"

Blink, "Yeah?"

"Shut up and let's see if this shit works."

"Uh…"

The kiss at first was tentative, experimental. It grew in fervor as their nerves settled. Her hands wrapped around his neck, legs locking behind him. He stood. Faye attached, and landed on the bed.


	11. Ch 11: End of the Line

Sadly, I do not own the characters of _Cowboy Bebop_. They are the property of Sunrise, Bones, and Bandai Visual (2001). They make the money, not me. Nor can I take credit my chapter headings- they are the product of their authors.

Chapter 11: End of the Line (Traveling Wilburys)

Worry filled Jet as he tried hailing the Bebop. Someone always answered, the unresponsiveness of his partners eating at him like a parasite. "Ed, pack up."

She frowned, "Why?"

"Something's wrong on the ship." He didn't want to worry her, but one look told him it was already too late, "I think Faye and Spike were locked into one of the unnecessary rooms, they aren't answering."

Ed gasped, she thought she'd covered for anything like that. "Maybe the Bebop is malfunctioning or..." she blushed, "Faye-Faye and Spike are busy?"

His head bounced. "Let's get back and make sure." He scanned the room, "You got everything?"

Nod.

Ushering her out the door, they rushed to the Hammerhead intent on getting back to the ship ASAP.

----------

Faye moaned, pressing against the hand splayed across her stomach. Spike groaned, returning the action with vigor. Neither heard the comm chirp, both too busy to care. The hands moved, Faye leaned close, noses brushing, both immediate fans of the test goo. Hand drifting from stomach to thigh he eased her legs apart, settling above her. She sighed, "Took you long enough, cowboy."

He hissed, "Wasn't sure I could compete with the bath tub."

She giggled, "No comparison."

He grinned as his elbows bent, "Have to admit this is better than the couch."

Her eyebrow rose.

Chuckle, "Don't have those stupid buttons digging in my back."

Arms snaking around his neck she stopped the teasing and removed the distance

----------

Jet dug at his head, still no answer. Panicked, he skirted a slow moving freighter and increased speed.

Ed scowled, "Edward thinks they are ok, Papa Jet." She grinned, "Maybe they are doing what you were certain James-boy was doing to Ed."

The man shifted, "What do you mean?"

She blinked at him, surprised she'd have to explain, "Papa Jet was afraid James would kiss Ed and Ed would like it and kiss him back."

Jet grinned, "Right."

She sighed, "He kissed Ed's cheek." Sigh, "It was nice." Gasp, "Don't kill him, please!"

He chuckled, "I think that's ok." He glanced at the teen, "Use the computer in the hangar to get air throughout the ship and the doors unlocked. I'm going to try and find 'em."

She nodded, "Ok Papa Jet." Gold eyes studied him, "Are you afraid they are dead or they are doing what Ed isn't allowed to see?"

Shift, "Both."

Her face soured, "That is really not nice if it is both." She pretended to pout, "Ah… So Ed is not allowed to see Spike and Faye-Faye swapping bodily fluids! No fair."

"Ed," his face curdled, "That's gross."

Blink, "It is what they are doing if they are not dead, isn't it?" Blink, "Unless they are doing both, which is just sad."

"Where do you come up with this stuff?"  
"Ed asks the right questions and listens to Spike and Faye mumble in their sleep." Snicker, "It's funny what they say."

"Probably'd make me blush."

Nod, "It would!"

----------

Faye sighed, her back pressing tight to the warm mass behind her. Grinning, Spike buried his nose in her neck as he pulled the bedding over them. His hand slipped up her thigh, across her stomach to settle on her diaphragm. She shivered at the soft caress and pressed closer. Her breathing soft and regular she murmured something below the thrum of the ship. Grinning, Spike's grip increased his own breathing regulating as sleep found him.

----------

Jet and Ed dashed from the ship both destined for their prospective jobs. Jet darted through the hatch and barreled down the hallway. His frantic pace slowed when he caught sight of the bedroom door. The room was dimly lit, the door kept open with a clunky boot. Grinning Jet peered through the breach. Two heads closely pressed together could be seen from the hallway glow. The power flickered, the entire ship returning to fully functional. Spike shifted, his grip on Faye pulling her with.

Shaking his head, Jet kicked the boot from the doorway and snapped it shut with a snort. "It's about time, idiots."

Ed giggled and sprinted by, "Yup. It's about time. Now Ed can have Faye-Faye's room!"

Jet scowled at her, "Where you headed."

She paused at the lounge doorway, "To talk to James."

She disappeared.

Jet following, "Hey Ed. ED! Don't sit on the couch!"

_Now a dynamic shift, think you can handle it, Cowboy?_


End file.
